The number of people who are at risk of serious health problems due to being overweight is increasing. What is the reason for the growth in overweight people in society? How can this problem be solved?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

The population facing significant health risks from excessive weight is on the rise.

This

Linking Words

is mainly

due to

Linking Words

their sedentary lifestyle and unhealthy

food

Use synonyms

consumption. There are a number of solutions that should be implemented to deal with the issue of being overweight.

Firstly

Linking Words

, the main reason why

this

Linking Words

issue has occurred is that many

people

Use synonyms

these days lead a sedentary lifestyle.

In other words

Linking Words

, most

people

Use synonyms

at present are busy at work, and they do not see the importance of exercising. Because of

this

Linking Words

, they cannot burn their calories, and

eventually

Add a comma

eventually,

show examples

they gain a lot of weight.

Secondly

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

prefer to eat high-calorie foods. In today’s world,

people

Use synonyms

are always in a rush, and they do not have time to prepare their own meals.

Therefore

Linking Words

, they choose fast

food

Use synonyms

and processed

food

Use synonyms

, which can be found easily everywhere. When

this

Linking Words

kind of

food

Use synonyms

is consumed every day, there is no doubt that

people

Use synonyms

can be overweight. There are two effective solutions to overcome

this

Linking Words

serious problem. One way to tackle

this

Linking Words

is to ensure that

people

Use synonyms

avoid overeating and take more exercise. The government can come up with an awareness program to educate

people

Use synonyms

about the importance of regular exercise. By doing

this

Linking Words

, it will help them burn calories and maintain their weight. Another way to deal with

this

Linking Words

problem is to avoid eating fast

food

Use synonyms

. They should invest their time in cooking at home and eating whole foods, which contain essential vitamins and minerals for the body.

This

Linking Words

can help them stay in shape. In conclusion, taking more exercise and eating healthy

food

Use synonyms

are effective ways to deal with

this

Linking Words

issue. If

people

Use synonyms

implemented these solutions, the number of overweight

people

Use synonyms

would soon drop.

s_syedySat Aug 05 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion

Consider integrating more varied complex sentence structures to enhance clarity and flow.

task achievement

To further improve your task achievement, try to delve deeper into each point with more specific examples and evidence.

introduction conclusion present

You effectively introduced and concluded your essay, which helps in guiding the reader through your argument.

logical structure

Your essay presents a clear structure that logically arranges ideas and explanations, aiding understanding.

relevant specific examples

The solutions you proposed are practical and relevant, demonstrating a good understanding of the task.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

286 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

obesity
sedentary
caloric intake
genetics
nutritional awareness
processed foods
fast food
lifestyle diseases
preventative measures
tax incentives
urban planning
community gardens
wellness initiatives
dietary guidelines
physical fitness
calorie-dense
portion control
metabolic rate
health literacy
food deserts
work-life balance
junk food
BMI (Body Mass Index)
non-communicable diseases
food labeling

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.
Nowadays, high levels of sugar are contained in many foods, especially in manufactured food, and the consumption of such food has a negative impact on human health. Some people suggest that consumers should be charged a higher price for sugary products in order to discourage them from buying them. In my opinion, this method is not very practical.
7
band
We are becoming increasingly dependent on computer-based technology. How do you think it will change in the future? Is it good for us to rely so much on computers?
It would be difficult to imagine life without computers. Over recent
7
band
Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?
In the contemporary epoch, the number of individuals who prefer to utilize conventional or modern treatments rather than visiting doctors increases. In my opinion, this is the negative trend that can cause detrimental effects on patients' remedy procedures and waste their money.
6.5
band
Planting trees is very important for the environment. Some people say trees should be planted in the vacant areas of city and towns, while others say housing facilities should be built instead. Do you agree or disagree?
Evergreens are considered vital for sustaining life on the earth owing to their importance in the purification of air, prevention of soil erosion and so on. Hence, there will be no denying the fact that seedlings are important for a sustainable future. In the current world, where people are running in a rat race to improve their living standards, there exists an argument which gives prominence to the construction of houses in vacant areas of towns and cities instead of growing some flora. I totally disagree with the aforementioned and this essay enlists the reasonable reasons behind my opinion by outlining some examples.
7
band
Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the place to learn this. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.
These days, many individuals want to help their children to be good members of society. Some believe parents should teach them, while others feel that school is better. In this essay, both perspectives will be discussed with examples.

The number of people who are at risk of serious health problems due to being overweight is increasing. What is the reason for the growth in overweight people in society? How can this problem be solved?

Fully explain your ideas

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar.

We are becoming increasingly dependent on computer-based technology. How do you think it will change in the future? Is it good for us to rely so much on computers?

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Planting trees is very important for the environment. Some people say trees should be planted in the vacant areas of city and towns, while others say housing facilities should be built instead. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the place to learn this. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.