IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The bar chart below illustrates five different industries’ percentage share of Brazil’s economy in 2009 and 2019 with a forecast for 2029. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart below illustrates five different industries’ percentage share of Brazil’s economy in 2009 and 2019 with a forecast for 2029. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The given chart depicts some industries' contributions as a percentage of
Brazil
Use synonyms
's
economy
Use synonyms
 in three different periods, which are 2009, 2019, and 2029.
Overall
Linking Words
, the share of five industries in
Brazil
Use synonyms
's
economy
Use synonyms
 has different patterns.
For example
Linking Words
, Finance has become the largest contributor to
Brazil
Use synonyms
's
economy
Use synonyms
 during the periods. Meanwhile, the contribution of the rest industries has fluctuated during the year, except for the Manufacturing industry which has decreased gradually for ten years and still continues. The percentage share of Finance in
Brazil
Use synonyms
's
economy
Use synonyms
 was above 30
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 in 2009 and 2019,
while
Linking Words
 in 2029 it will reach 40
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
Food
Correct article usage
the Food
show examples
 Processing industry experienced a sharp growth in 2019 but the projection shows it will fall in 2029 to the same level of 2009. The same phenomenon has occurred
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
 Oil, coal, and gas
company
Fix the agreement mistake
companies
show examples
.
While
Linking Words
 the Tourism sector experienced a slight
decreased
Replace the word
decrease
show examples
 in its contribution to
Brazil
Use synonyms
's
economy
Use synonyms
 from 2009 to 2029,
accounted
Wrong verb form
accounting
show examples
 for 20 to 25 percent of the
economy
Use synonyms
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words brazil, economy with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: