The map below shows the changes that have taken place at the waterfront area of a town called Darwin between 2009 and 2014.

#changes #place #waterfront #area #town #darwin

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The diagram below illustrates how the waterfront area of a town called Darwin

Unnecessary verb

apply

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changed between 2009 and 2014.

Overall

Linking Words

, the realm did not change that much since some institutions were still at the same places

such

Linking Words

school

Fix the agreement mistake

schools

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, fishing

part

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parties

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and convention

center

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centers

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Nevertheless

Linking Words

, many developments occurred

either

Correct word choice

apply

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besides

Linking Words

that, more trees were planted, in 2009, there were only trees but in 2014 the trees were increasing over 10.

Firstly

Linking Words

, in 2009, the lake was surrounded by

the

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foot path

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footpath

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which was the only route to visit the sea. there were 2 industrial areas,

however

Linking Words

, the places were replaced by

swimming

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the swimming

a swimming

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pool and university building,

furthermore

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, the black buildings ascended from 3 to 6 five years later.

Secondly

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, in 2014, apart from the increasing number of plants, a swimming pool

were

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was

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added near the lake

hence

Linking Words

there were 3 pools during the period,

in addition

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, the harbour

were

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was

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built beside the sea and the crowds could follow the new

foot path

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footpath

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to go to the place.

Submitted by nutthan.aud on Fri Apr 26 2024

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.

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Vocabulary: The word "changed" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

167 words

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The map below shows the changes that have taken place at the waterfront area of a town called Darwin between 2009 and 2014.

Shopping is the favourite pastime of most of the young people. Why is this the case? Do you think they should be encouraged to do some other useful activities in their free time?

Some people think that success in life coms from hard work and determination, while others think that there are more important factors such as money and appearance. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. What are the advantages and disadvantages of driverless vehicles?

Some people prefer to go to health clubs and gyms for health care, some say the walking and climbing stairs are more effective. Discuss both vies and give your opinion.