Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which view point do you agree with?

#people #advertisements #products #lives #point

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In contemporary discourse, there exists a viewpoint asserting that advertising inspires us to collect things that we really do not need. some individuals argue that advertisements tell us about the latest

products

Use synonyms

that may enhance our lives.

However

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, I vehemently agree with the importance of advertising. In the forthcoming paragraph, I shall explain why advertisement is a necessary key for consumers. On the one hand, it is important to acknowledge that adverts not only help people save money by informing them about real bargains but

also

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enable people to compare

products

Use synonyms

and services.

Therefore

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, if you do not have time to shop around, you can rely on advertising to learn about new stuff.

Moreover

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, adverts inform consumers regarding the environmental impacts of

products

Use synonyms

, and purchasers can easily find out if a company supports fair trade.

For example

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, an electronics machine-based company arranges trade fairs, which is why buyers can learn about upgraded devices.

Nevertheless

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, on the flip side, proponents argue that advertising often promotes

products

Use synonyms

and services that aren't truly desired, leading to the creation of artificial demands.

Consequently

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, people end up purchasing things solely

due to

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the perceived association with power, success, and glamour.

Additionally

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,Children are easily influenced by brochures and

then

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pester their parents to consume certain goods.

Hence

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,The ultimate aim of brochures is to subtly persuade them to buy the latest things.

For instance

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,companies give regular sales or free stuff all around the year. In conclusion,

while

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advertising serves as a valuable tool for informing users about new

products

Use synonyms

, its pervasive influence often leads to unnecessary purchases driven by images of status and glamour.

Thus

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, individuals should approach advertising with critical discernment to ensure their spending aligns with their genuine needs and priorities.

Submitted by Alma Islam on Fri Apr 26 2024

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coherence cohesion

Ensure clarity in presenting your main points by structuring your essay into clear paragraphs, each dedicated to a specific aspect of your argument.

task achievement

Try to provide more specific examples to support your arguments, adding depth and persuasiveness to your essay.

task achievement

Work on refining your introduction to more directly address the prompt, ensuring your thesis statement is explicit about your standpoint.

coherence cohesion

You've done well in presenting both sides of the argument before stating your opinion, which contributes to a balanced discussion.

coherence cohesion

Your conclusion effectively summarizes your viewpoint, reinforcing the main arguments of the essay.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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14
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

283 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Advertising
Encourages
Buy things
Do not need
Advertisements
Tell
New products
Improve
Lives
Viewpoint
Agree
Sometimes
Lead to
Persuasive techniques
Convince
Unnecessary purchases
Waste
Consumption
Clever
Marketing strategies
Influenced
Innovative technology
Solutions
Educate
Options
Choices
Market
Help
Informed decisions
Products
Services

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Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which view point do you agree with?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

We are becoming increasingly dependent on computers- based on technology. How do you think it will change in the future? Is it good for us to rely so much on computers?

In some cities of the world, cars are replacing bicycles. However, in some cities, bicycle are replacing cars. What are the reason for this for these developments? In your opinion, which one is better?

In some countries, marriages are arranged by the parents but in other cases, people choose their own marriage partners discuss and give your own opinion.