Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which view point do you agree with?

In contemporary discourse, there exists a viewpoint asserting that advertising inspires us to collect things that we really do not need. some individuals argue that advertisements tell us about the latest
products
that may enhance our lives.
However
, I vehemently agree with the importance of advertising. In the forthcoming paragraph, I shall explain why advertisement is a necessary key for consumers. On the one hand, it is important to acknowledge that adverts not only help people save money by informing them about real bargains but
also
enable people to compare
products
and services.
Therefore
, if you do not have time to shop around, you can rely on advertising to learn about new stuff.
Moreover
, adverts inform consumers regarding the environmental impacts of
products
, and purchasers can easily find out if a company supports fair trade.
For example
, an electronics machine-based company arranges trade fairs, which is why buyers can learn about upgraded devices.
Nevertheless
, on the flip side, proponents argue that advertising often promotes
products
and services that aren't truly desired, leading to the creation of artificial demands.
Consequently
, people end up purchasing things solely
due to
the perceived association with power, success, and glamour.
Additionally
,Children are easily influenced by brochures and
then
pester their parents to consume certain goods.
Hence
,The ultimate aim of brochures is to subtly persuade them to buy the latest things.
For instance
,companies give regular sales or free stuff all around the year. In conclusion,
while
advertising serves as a valuable tool for informing users about new
products
, its pervasive influence often leads to unnecessary purchases driven by images of status and glamour.
Thus
, individuals should approach advertising with critical discernment to ensure their spending aligns with their genuine needs and priorities.
Submitted by Alma Islam on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure clarity in presenting your main points by structuring your essay into clear paragraphs, each dedicated to a specific aspect of your argument.
task achievement
Try to provide more specific examples to support your arguments, adding depth and persuasiveness to your essay.
task achievement
Work on refining your introduction to more directly address the prompt, ensuring your thesis statement is explicit about your standpoint.
coherence cohesion
You've done well in presenting both sides of the argument before stating your opinion, which contributes to a balanced discussion.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes your viewpoint, reinforcing the main arguments of the essay.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Advertising
  • Encourages
  • Buy things
  • Do not need
  • Advertisements
  • Tell
  • New products
  • Improve
  • Lives
  • Viewpoint
  • Agree
  • Sometimes
  • Lead to
  • Persuasive techniques
  • Convince
  • Unnecessary purchases
  • Waste
  • Consumption
  • Clever
  • Marketing strategies
  • Influenced
  • Innovative technology
  • Solutions
  • Educate
  • Options
  • Choices
  • Market
  • Help
  • Informed decisions
  • Products
  • Services
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