IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

In order to solve traffic problems, governments should tax private car owners heavily and use their money to improve public transportation. What are the advantages and disadvantages of such a solution?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Although
Linking Words
 it is believed that extra taxation for private car drivers is detrimental, I hold the conviction that
this
Linking Words
 enforcement can play a beneficial role in solving traffic issues and the money collected from the extra tax can be helpful to enhance the status of public
transport
Use synonyms
 facilities. On the one hand, a group of people assert that private
cars
Use synonyms
 are an inseparable part of society
due to
Linking Words
 the fact that an overwhelming majority of citizens are white collars, and their demands for convenient travel cannot be overlooked. Had employees spent their time commuting, it would be a significant dissatisfaction as they
work
Use synonyms
 all day long and they must spend a considerable duration of time going to
work
Use synonyms
 and returning home.
Therefore
Linking Words
, private
cars
Use synonyms
 should be accepted as a required facility for citizens, and they must not incur excess taxes.
For instance
Linking Words
, in Turkey, many individuals
work
Use synonyms
 in Istanbul, a metropolis,
while
Linking Words
 they reside in the suburbs and find it more comfortable
as well as
Linking Words
 less time-consuming to get to
work
Use synonyms
 driving their own
cars
Use synonyms
instead
Linking Words
 of catching buses, trains, or other kinds of public
transport
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, other groups of individuals claim that the increasing number of
cars
Use synonyms
, especially private ones, is one of the most remarkable reasons for air pollution, traffic congestion, and environmental damage.
Hence
Linking Words
, it is essential that governments determine superior amounts of tax for private
cars
Use synonyms
, which leads to a lower utilization of private vehicles and a higher use of public
transport
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, a tremendous sum of these taxes can be employed to improve the status of public transportation, encompassing modernizing buses, undergrounds, and even taxis, which causes citizens to take them more frequently. Let us take Japan, a developed country that has modern, clean, and convenient public
transport
Use synonyms
, as an example in which a significant percentage of workers commute to
work
Use synonyms
 using the metro, bus, and taxi,
according to
Linking Words
 a survey, as they declare that they are able to catch their destinations without wasting time sticking in a traffic jam. In conclusion, after considering the above-mentioned points and both notions, I am inclined to believe that, governments must take
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
responsibility for lessening the amount that private
cars
Use synonyms
 are driven.
Accordingly
Linking Words
, imposing extra tax is one of the appropriate solutions to decrease the number of private
cars
Use synonyms
as well as
Linking Words
 increase the quality of public transportation and the number of those who prefer using it.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

relevant specific examples
Ensure that all examples are directly relevant to the main points being discussed. This will bolster the strength of your arguments by providing concrete evidence.
clear comprehensive ideas
While your ideas are quite clear, consider introducing a bit more variety in vocabulary and sentence structures to keep the reader engaged and to better demonstrate your language proficiency.
logical structure
You have maintained a logical structure throughout the essay, which makes it easy for the reader to follow your arguments.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction and conclusion are both well-presented and serve their purposes effectively — the introduction sets up the topic nicely and the conclusion summarizes your viewpoint clearly.
supported main points
You have supported your main points well with concrete examples, such as those from Turkey and Japan, adding credibility to your arguments.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Traffic congestion
  • Emissions
  • Revenue generation
  • Public dissatisfaction
  • Political issues
  • Financial burden
  • Environmental benefits
  • Efficiency and accessibility
  • Taxation
  • Heavily taxing
  • Private car owners
  • Fund improvements
  • Discourage the use
  • Healthier environment
  • Public transport quality
What to do next:
Look at other essays: