Nowadays a growing number of people with health problems trying alternative medicine and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctors. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

#people #health #alternative #medicine #treatments #doctors #development

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Recently, the number of people with health

issue

Fix the agreement mistake

issues

show examples

who opt for alternative methods

such

as medicine and treatments

instead

of going to see

doctors

has increased. In my opinion,

this

viewpoint brings only disadvantages to our communities, the reasons will be outlined in the following paragraphs before a conclusion is reached. In the first place, the health problems or diseases will worsen as patients do not have an understanding of the symptoms and situations they encounter at that time. Buying their own medicines that are suggested on the internet, might lead them to get more bad effects on their bodies.

Moreover

, even if they are going to see therapists around patients' communities, most of them have no legit licenses which are given by related authorities,

for example

, the health organisation, which

mean

Correct subject-verb agreement

means

show examples

they are not able to comprehend and analyse the diseases correctly as same as the

doctors

which familiar in

this

field. In the second place, self-treatment without knowledge affects the reliability of the doctor's occupation in the future.

For instance

, children who live with their elders who have been infected by

virus

Fix the agreement mistake

viruses

show examples

or bacteria

as well as

thinking that it is just a fever and buy their own medicines. After seeing their grandparents take some pills and feel better, it will lead to the misunderstanding of treatments.

Additionally

, these youngsters

then

believe that they do not need to listen to the

doctors

, only just do the same as their grandparents do. All in all, I strongly disagree with

this

viewpoint.

Although

, nowadays many people tend to treat themselves by taking medicines or treatments and do not go to hospitals. It is essential to let

doctors

analyse the issues with care and precision.

Besides

, these habits will pass through the younger generation, and teach them to believe and trust in

doctors

Submitted by nnatthinee on Sat Apr 27 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

Ensure your essay addresses all parts of the task to maintain task relevance and completeness.

coherence cohesion

Develop your argument with clear, logical progression and use paragraphing to distinguish between points.

coherence cohesion

Incorporate a wider range of sentence structures and vocabulary to enhance readability and audience engagement.

task achievement

Your essay addresses the given topic directly and maintains a clear position throughout, which shows strong task achievement.

coherence cohesion

The logical structure of your essay, with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion, effectively communicates your ideas to the reader.

coherence cohesion

You've supported your main points with specific examples, which strengthens your argument and demonstrates critical thinking.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

302 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
Some people say history is one of the most important school subjects. Other people think that in today’s world subjects like science and technology are more important than history. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant example from your knowledge or experience.
To begin, individuals think that history is a crucial part of school subjects but other people propose that nowadays subjects such as science and technology are most precise in the modern world rather than the past. It has some advantages and disadvantages related to this statement and I will discuss both views in detail in upcoming paragraphs.
6.5
band
Some countries have an ever-increasing proportion of population who are aged at 15 or younger. What is your opinion of the current and future effects it may have in those countries
Nowadays, the percentage of children under 15 years old in some countries has increased. In this essay, I will discuss the potential problem of this trend, and then describe the possible effects of this issue in the present and future.
7.5
band
Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
While some people argue that professional workers should benefit the society of their own country,others, including me, consider that they should have the autonomy to work where they want as they can gain more money and have better living conditions.
5.5
band
Some people say that the increasing business and cultural contract between countries is a positive development, while others think that many countries will lose their national identities as a result. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
There is no doubt, that globalisation has developed, and some people argue against it because countries lose national atributes; however, other believe in a positive effect of the phenomenon, and I support them.
6
band
You have recently bought an airline ticket from a travel agency and unfortunately you are not able to fly on these dates. Write a letter to the travel agency manager to cancel the ticket. Explain in your letter: What are the flight details Why do you want to cancel it What would you like him/her to do about it
I am writing to ask you to make some alterations to my flight reservation. Allow me to elaborate on the situation.

Nowadays a growing number of people with health problems trying alternative medicine and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctors. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Some countries have an ever-increasing proportion of population who are aged at 15 or younger. What is your opinion of the current and future effects it may have in those countries

Some people say that the increasing business and cultural contract between countries is a positive development, while others think that many countries will lose their national identities as a result. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.