IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

There is
ongoing
Add an article
an ongoing
the ongoing
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 discourse on whether accepting
Use synonyms
situation
Correct article usage
a situation
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 is best or not even if the
situation
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 can’t find genuine satisfaction. Some
people
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 might believe that accepting a bad
situation
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 is necessary;
however
Linking Words
, I firmly believe that it is crucial to improve
such
Linking Words
Use synonyms
situation
Correct article usage
a situation
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 if
individuals
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 have
compraint
Correct your spelling
complaints
. First of foremost, on the side of one, suppressing an unsatisfactory
situation
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 enables
individuals
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 to facilitate
ability
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the ability
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of
Replace the preposition
to
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 broaden
perspective
Correct pronoun usage
their perspective
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. More often than not, there are many
people
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 to quit their
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
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 when they
faced
Wrong verb form
face
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 difficulties in their satisfaction.
However
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, in response to endure in
such
Linking Words
Use synonyms
situation
Correct article usage
a situation
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, some
people
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is
Change the verb form
are
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 able to find two
side
Change to a plural noun
sides
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 to everything even their workspace, thereby understanding everything happens for a reason.
For example
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, my friend who
work
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works
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 as a business consultant had
complaint
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a complaint
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 about
reduction
Correct article usage
the reduction
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of
Change preposition
in
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 his leisure time as
working
Correct pronoun usage
his working
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 hours
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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 long.
However
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, he turned to
understand
Replace the word
understanding
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 when he realized that his duty has a lot of responsibility because his work
connect
Change the verb form
connects
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 to
regenerate
Wrong verb form
regenerating
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 the management condition of a
corporate
Replace the word
corporation
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. After he
realized
Wrong verb form
realises
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 it, he can
be find
Change the verb form
find
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positive
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a positive
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 side even if
faced
Wrong verb form
faces
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 difficulties. In
this
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 regard, enduring
hard
Correct article usage
a hard
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environment
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 provides
for
Change preposition
apply
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individuals
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 with
opportunity
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an opportunity
the opportunity
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 to find a viewpoint considering the duality. On the other
hands
Fix the agreement mistake
hand
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,
trying
Add the particle
trying to
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 improve
unsatisfactory
Correct article usage
an unsatisfactory
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situation
Use synonyms
 enables
individuals
Use synonyms
 to experience surpassing the limit by themselves. Facing an unsatisfactory
environment
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 means the result of their choices.
This
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 can search for what they lack or what they
genuine
Change the word
genuinely
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 desire
for
Change preposition
apply
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. Asking oneself has significant power to reflect their life direction.
According to
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 research by McKinsey & Company,
individuals
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 who try to improve their lack factors become successful in
business
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the business
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 world compared to those who never encounter
to
Change preposition
apply
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weakness by themselves. In
this
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 regard, not accepting to existing
environment
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enable
Correct subject-verb agreement
enables
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individuals
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 to try their
limit
Fix the agreement mistake
limits
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, thereby striving
their
Change preposition
for their
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 efforts and getting a better quality of life. In my opinion, improving rather than accepting
in
Correct your spelling
an
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 unsatisfactory
situation
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 should be the main priority.
leveled
Change the spelling
levelled
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 up owned skills can lead to not only
find
Wrong verb form
finding
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 genuine satisfaction but
also
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have
Unnecessary verb
apply
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economic benefits, thereby significantly raising the value of human
being
Fix the agreement mistake
beings
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. In conclusion,
while
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 accepting
existing
Correct article usage
the existing
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environment
Use synonyms
 allows many
people
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 to find various
perspective
Fix the agreement mistake
perspectives
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, I believe that improving skill sets
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 more significant, as finding genuine fulfillment should be prioritized.

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task response
Be sure to directly answer the question in the introduction to make your opinion clear from the beginning.
coherence and cohesion
Use a variety of cohesive devices effectively but be careful not to overuse them, aiming for a natural flow.
task response
Ensure examples are directly related to the points made for stronger support and clarity.
language
Check for minor spelling or grammatical errors that can be easily corrected for improved accuracy.
coherence and cohesion
You have a clear logical structure, making it easy to follow your argument.
task response
The essay effectively discusses both views before providing your own opinion, fulfilling the task's requirements.
task response
Providing real-life examples like the story of your friend adds a strong, relatable aspect to your argument.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • adversity
  • resilience
  • stoicism
  • contentment
  • cope
  • adapt
  • endure
  • persevere
  • settle
  • ambition
  • tenacious
  • determined
  • resourceful
  • optimistic
  • self-improvement
  • proactive
  • initiative
  • transform
  • overcome
  • confront
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