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Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

your English-speaking friend has asked for your help with a college project he or she is doing about celebrating Nes Year in different countries. write a letter to your friend. in your letter write a letter to your friend.in your letter : 1 say how important new year is to people in your country . 2describe now new year is celebrated in your country . 3 explain what you like about New Year celebrations in your country.

#friend #college #project #nes #year #countries #people #country #celebrations
Dear Minh, Long time no see, how are you? I just got your letter
this
 morning, and your project sounds very interesting. I will share with you about my New
Year
 celebration in Vietnam. As you know, New
Year
 is
a
Change the article
the
show examples
 biggest holiday in Vietnam. It's the best time for families and friends to reunite.
Besides
 that, students and workers
also
 have about 10 days off to relax with their families. There are some traditional methods in
this
 event.
Firstly
, adults often give the "lucky money" to children. It means they put some money into a red
envelop
Replace the word
envelope
show examples
, and the kids will give them
the
Change the word
their
show examples
 best wishes.
Secondly
, we usually go to the pagodas or churches
as well as
 we believe that praying to the gods may bring health and happiness to people around us.
Personal
Change the word
Personally
show examples
 speaking,
this
 is my
most
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
favourite part of the
year
. I totally spend
own
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
my time being family and friends.
Additionally
, travelling to Vung Tau
beach
Capitalize word
Beach
show examples
 is
also
 in my plan
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
this
 New
Year
 celebration. I hope these things can be useful for your project. Best regards, Hung Phung
Submitted by Hungmap on

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Task Response
Consider elaborating more on the cultural significance of the New Year in Vietnam to enhance task response.
Coherence and Cohesion
Make sure each paragraph transitions smoothly into the next to improve readability.
Greeting and Closing
Effective use of greeting and closing, creating a friendly and appropriate tone for the letter.
Logical Structure
Clear structuring of paragraphs, each dedicated to different aspects of the topic.
Task Achievement
Your personal experiences add a unique perspective to the New Year celebrations, making your letter more engaging.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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