In Britain, when someone gets old they often go to live in a home with other old people where there are nurses to look after them. Sometimes the government has to pay for this care. Who do you think should pay for this care, the government or the family? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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When a person matures and
reach
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reaches
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their old age in the United Kingdom, they are usually sent to a house for the elderly where nurses look after them. In some cases,
national
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the national
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government provides the funds for
this
care.
However
, a number of people wonder who should be responsible for them, their families or the rulers of the country. In my opinion, the higher-ups should be the ones to do as the medical treatment is getting more expensive
as well as
the fact that retired people have paid their taxes for the state.
To begin
with, the medical equipment and facilities are getting more advanced and pricey every day and as
such
, the relatives of the seniors will have a problem supporting them. To put it simply, their brood
maybe
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may
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not
able
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be able
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to provide the necessary financial support as they are busy preparing
the
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for the
show examples
future of their children.
For instance
, they could be working at a
low salary
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low-salary
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job merely to supply their kid with everything they may need.
Therefore
,
British
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the British
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government should pay for their
safe keeping
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safekeeping
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as the families of retirees may be too busy or not financially stable enough to provide
them
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for them
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themselves.
Furthermore
, the grandparents have paid their duty to the top brass of their nation, and they should give a good environment in return.
In other words
, the old-timers of England had already made their contributions to their kingdom at
young
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a young
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age,
consequently
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consequently,
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it would only be fair
,
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apply
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if the ministry had ensured that they
are
Wrong verb form
were
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given
an
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apply
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appropriate attention by professional nurses and specialists.
For example
, in 2022-23 Britain had raised around 1 trillion
income
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in income
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from charging their citizens,
that
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which
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is around 40% of
whole
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the whole
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economy of
UK
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the UK
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.
Hence
, the heads of the state should be the ones to fund the treatment
for
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of
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the elderly, as a favour to them for being loyal civilians and paying taxes. In conclusion,
treatment
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the treatment
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of aged people should be entrusted to
government
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the government
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as the close relatives may be too busy and
due to
the fact that the seniors have already paid their duty to their country.
Submitted by akzharkynzhamal on

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task achievement
To improve your task response, consider exploring a wider range of arguments and ensuring that your opinion is directly addressed with clear justifications throughout the essay. Additionally, expanding on the implications or exploring counterarguments might enrich your discussion.
coherence cohesion
To enhance coherence and cohesion, aim to use a wider variety of linking words and phrases to connect ideas more smoothly. Clear paragraphing is effectively used; however, diversifying your sentence structures could enhance the readability and flow of your essay.
Introduction/Conclusion
The essay provides a clear introduction and conclusion that effectively frame the discussion, directly addressing the topic question.
Supported Main Points
You make a strong case for your opinion with relevant examples and explanations, demonstrating a good understanding of the topic at hand.
Logical Structure
The logical structure of your essay is commendable, with each paragraph focusing on a specific aspect of the argument. This clarity helps in maintaining the reader's interest and understanding of the topic.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Aging population
  • Elderly care
  • Nursing homes
  • Social welfare
  • Intergenerational responsibility
  • Caregiving
  • Financial burden
  • Quality of life
  • Pension funds
  • Healthcare policy
  • Taxation
  • Subsidies
  • Private insurance
  • Long-term care
  • Sustainability
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