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Writing Samples
Band 7

some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion?

#people #situation #job #shortage #money #situations
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It is argued among individuals that if someone is not satisfied with their occupation or salary, they do not have any choice but to tolerate
such
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 situations.
However
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, other individuals have a distinctive view; they say it is a good thing to try and make those difficult circumstances better. In
this
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 essay, I will discuss both of these views and give my own opinion.
To begin
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 with, when someone is in difficulties, they sometimes lose all their hopes;
moreover
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, they adapt to that situation because they think there is nothing that can be done to improve it.
Although
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 it is true that not always everything can be done to change
people
Use synonyms
’s lives and make it convenient for them, especially these days,
due to
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 economic issues and recession, finding a proper job with a good salary plus an extra wage is often impossible for all
people
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, and it requires an impressive resume and, better yet, good luck.
Therefore
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, some citizens lose their hopes and try to get used to terrible circumstances. I do not believe that finding a solution is impossible in fact, we witnessed some citizens trying to find solutions even in challenging lifetimes, these
people
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 sacrificed everything to just make their current situation better. It needs to be said that not everyone is capable of making a difference, which is why all
people
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 must learn from them and become a better version of themselves.
For instance
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, after the Coronavirus pandemic, many companies faced financial issues, but after years of trying and improving, they
finally
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 overcame that problem.
To sum up
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, as I mentioned, I have the same belief as those
people
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 who think improvement can alter inconvenient situations: no matter how hard it can get, there is always a way that can help us enhance our lives.
Submitted by abbasisarina340 on

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task achievement
Try to include more specific examples to support your arguments, as they add depth and credibility to your essay.
coherence cohesion
Ensure a clear and distinct separation between paragraphs to improve logical flow.
coherence cohesion
Using transitional phrases can enhance the cohesion between your ideas, making your argument more coherent.
task achievement
You successfully discussed both views and provided your own opinion, which is crucial for task achievement.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are present and contribute to a clear structure, enhancing the readability of your essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • adversity
  • resilience
  • stoicism
  • contentment
  • cope
  • adapt
  • endure
  • persevere
  • settle
  • ambition
  • tenacious
  • determined
  • resourceful
  • optimistic
  • self-improvement
  • proactive
  • initiative
  • transform
  • overcome
  • confront
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