Convenience foods will become increasingly prevalent (widespread) and eventually replace traditional foods and methods of preparation. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, fast
food
will
Verb problem
has
show examples
become popular and is increasing significantly.
Due to
this
, our traditional
foods
and methods of preparation can be replaced by foreign
foods
or
convenience
foods
.
On the other hand
,
this
trend may be a good selection but has a bad impact in other states. On the one hand, if
foods
cook faster,
also
sell cheaper, and
people
tend to buy more
food
. If
foods
have will be unusual,
such
as
convenience
food
and tastier,
people
desire to buy appear interested that's
foods
will buy.
For example
, hamburgers, sandwiches and lavashs.
Moreover
,
people
learned how to new
food
and new recept cooking, rather than eating their national dish all the time.
On the other hand
, for various reasons, it would be wrong to replace traditional
foods
with
convenience
foods
. Especially,
convenience
foods
are physically dangerous to humans because they are high in sugar, carbohydrates, or saturated fat and lack vitamins or minerals.
Furthermore
, if all individuals prefer to buy only
convenience
foods
, their traditional
foods
, traditional culture and methods of preparation can disappear. If
people
get used to using
convenience
foods
they can be lazy and, they may even will not even be able to cook for their family members. In conclusion,it all depends on the person. If
people
balance their consumption of fast
foods
, don't their traditional
foods
.
Submitted by saydusmonovasomiddin94 on

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Introduction Improvement
Enhance the introduction to directly address the essay question more clearly. Though your stance is implied, explicitly stating whether you agree or disagree would make your position clearer to the reader.
Paragraph Structure Improvement
Work on paragraph structuring to make transitions smoother between ideas. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea and supporting sentences that are directly related.
Language Use Improvement
Be mindful of grammatical errors and aim to use a wider range of vocabulary without compromising accuracy. This will help in making your argument stronger and more compelling.
Example Detail Enhancement
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Topic Understanding
You touched on important aspects of the topic, showing an understanding of the complexity of the issue.
Relevance to Task
You successfully contrasted convenience foods and traditional foods, showing the impacts on health and culture, which is relevant to the task.

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