Convenience foods will become increasingly prevalent (widespread) and eventually replace traditional foods and methods of preparation. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Nowadays, fast
food
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will
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has
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become popular and is increasing significantly.
Due to
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this
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, our traditional
foods
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and methods of preparation can be replaced by foreign
foods
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or
convenience
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foods
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.
On the other hand
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,
this
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trend may be a good selection but has a bad impact in other states. On the one hand, if
foods
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cook faster,
also
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sell cheaper, and
people
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tend to buy more
food
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. If
foods
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have will be unusual,
such
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as
convenience
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food
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and tastier,
people
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desire to buy appear interested that's
foods
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will buy.
For example
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, hamburgers, sandwiches and lavashs.
Moreover
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,
people
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learned how to new
food
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and new recept cooking, rather than eating their national dish all the time.
On the other hand
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, for various reasons, it would be wrong to replace traditional
foods
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with
convenience
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foods
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. Especially,
convenience
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foods
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are physically dangerous to humans because they are high in sugar, carbohydrates, or saturated fat and lack vitamins or minerals.
Furthermore
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, if all individuals prefer to buy only
convenience
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foods
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, their traditional
foods
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, traditional culture and methods of preparation can disappear. If
people
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get used to using
convenience
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foods
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they can be lazy and, they may even will not even be able to cook for their family members. In conclusion,it all depends on the person. If
people
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balance their consumption of fast
foods
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, don't their traditional
foods
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.
Submitted by saydusmonovasomiddin94 on

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Introduction Improvement
Enhance the introduction to directly address the essay question more clearly. Though your stance is implied, explicitly stating whether you agree or disagree would make your position clearer to the reader.
Paragraph Structure Improvement
Work on paragraph structuring to make transitions smoother between ideas. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea and supporting sentences that are directly related.
Language Use Improvement
Be mindful of grammatical errors and aim to use a wider range of vocabulary without compromising accuracy. This will help in making your argument stronger and more compelling.
Example Detail Enhancement
Try to include more developed examples to support your points. Specific examples can significantly strengthen your arguments and make them more convincing to the reader.
Topic Understanding
You touched on important aspects of the topic, showing an understanding of the complexity of the issue.
Relevance to Task
You successfully contrasted convenience foods and traditional foods, showing the impacts on health and culture, which is relevant to the task.

Your opinion

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