Many people believe that the high levels of violence in films today are causing serious social problems.
It is believed that major social issues were bred by the escalating rates of violence in movies. In my view, there are two substantial problems inducing the concerns;
however
, these also
have the
ways to decrease which will be discussed in Correct article usage
apply
this
essay.
Firstly
, FOMO
(Fear Of Missing Out), known as the state of eager
to copy what others conduct usually Add a missing verb
being eager
by
social media, is capable Change preposition
through
to affect
individuals to behave Change preposition
of affecting
what
Change preposition
in what
the
actors or actresses do. Correct article usage
apply
For instance
, films
showing the watchers how the actresses bring up their children in a turbulent way is
highly likely to be imitated since the public Correct subject-verb agreement
are
do
not Correct subject-verb agreement
does
posses
sceptical views. Correct your spelling
possess
Hence
, people with FOMO
will have a tendency to mirror what are
in Correct subject-verb agreement
is
films
shown.
Furthermore
, a phychological
disorder is the other contributing problem that Correct your spelling
psychological
films
are able to bring on social problems. It belongs to persons who are easy to be deeply affected by films
; it frequently induces them to weep and even commit what is being played in the film if the film's ending is out of his or her expectation
. Romance movies showing revenge on his or her couple, Fix the agreement mistake
expectations
for example
, often influence viewers with the
Remove the article
apply
such
disorder. They usually conduct the same thing to the environment to satisfy her himself
.
Correct pronoun usage
apply
Nevertheless
, they are still probable to solve and reduce by having a stable state of emotion. FOMO
can be prevented from happening by comprehending the ins and outs of the attitude which have
a probability Correct subject-verb agreement
has
to be
imitated. The latter can Change preposition
of being
also
be reduced by realizing that films
have their own plots and a predictable ending so that the viewers is
able to control themselves from not being easily affected.
In conclusion, Change the verb form
are
FOMO
and a psycholigical
disorder are the contributing issues of social problems caused by movies. These have their own ways in order to decrease so that we can utilize film in a proper way.Correct your spelling
psychological
Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Language accuracy
Make sure to proofread your essay to catch and correct minor spelling or grammatical errors. For example, 'phychological' should be 'psychological'. Attention to detail can enhance the clarity of your argument.
Elaboration
Expand on your examples by providing more detailed scenarios or statistics. This will strengthen your argument and make your examples more compelling.
Language variety
Consider varying your sentence structures more to demonstrate a wide range of linguistic skills. This variety can make your writing more engaging.
Introduction & Conclusion
Your essay effectively introduces and concludes the discussion, providing a clear overview and conclusion of your arguments.
Logical structure & coherence
You have a clear logical structure that guides the reader through your arguments, making your essay coherent and cohesive.
Task relevance & example usage
Your essay consistently addresses the topic, maintaining relevance and providing specific examples to support your points.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS
Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!