Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organisation. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?
In modern times, individuals prefer to have their own company and
work
for themselves rather than join an organisation. I believe this
thing is due to
the fact that working for yourself is much easier and has some cons for individuals which no one can deny, however
, there are some pros which need to be discussed like a lack of salary
and no insurance
.
To begin
with, these days, a number of people
decided to have their own business, this
thing was because of some advantages which self-employed have. One of these advantages is, by being self-employed, people
can work
whenever they want moreover
, they can consider more free time for themselves.
Another major benefit of having your own business is that people
can select whomever they want to work
with, when someone works for a company, they have a lot of co-workers who are very annoying and bother people
all the time, consequently
, those people
create a very disturbing atmosphere for other employees; especially some bosses are very strict.
Admittedly, there are some negative points for this
notion which we cannot ignore.
The first drawback is that,
it requires a lot of budget to organise a business, which means Remove the comma
apply
people
need enough money to rent a place, equipment, and also
, for hiring some staff. In addition
, after being self-employed some people
might not get a salary
or get a lower salary
which can cause money issues.
Another drawback is that,
some Remove the comma
apply
people
by working for an organisation get health insurance
and other insurance
which are very beneficial for them, self-employed do not have those insurances, especially in the first years of their work
.
For instance
, Google company give their employees health insurance
and with that, all their health services are almost free.
To sum up
, nowadays, we witnessed
that the number of self-employers increased dramaticallyWrong verb form
witness
,
because these jobs make individuals feel at ease and Remove the comma
apply
also
give them this
opportunity to choose their own colleagues, while
not having insurance
and not enough salary
can be the disadvantages
of being self-employed.Fix the agreement mistake
disadvantage
Submitted by abbasisarina340 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Task Achievement
Your essay provides a balanced view on the subject with clear advantages and disadvantages, which effectively answers the prompt. However, consider offering more specific examples to support your main points for a more compelling argument.
Coherence & Cohesion
Your essay shows good organization with a clear structure, including an introduction and a conclusion which effectively wrap up your discussion. To further improve coherence, make sure to use linking words and phrases to better connect your ideas and paragraphs.
Coherence & Cohesion
You have a clear structure, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, effectively organizing your response.
Task Achievement
You successfully address both parts of the question, discussing reasons for self-employment and its disadvantages, which shows good task achievement.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.