Around the world, many adults are working from home, and more children are beginning to study from home because technology has become cheaper and more accessible. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Cheaper and highly accessible
technology
is now leading to more
children
and adults
to study
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studying
show examples
and
work
Wrong verb form
working
show examples
from
home
,
although
it has both positives and negatives, I tend to lean towards the positive aspects. A surge in number of adults and
children
continuing their
work
from
home
has become the new trend. The main positive aspect that stands out is that
although
the traditional offline aspect is where it all started
from
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apply
show examples
, now
children
and adults are less
stress free
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stress-free
show examples
of not having to keep up with the timings of their
instituitions
Correct your spelling
institutions
. Working or studying from
home
with the help of
technology
helps them in achieving their tasks in a calm environment,
moreover
increasing the productivity and efficiency of their
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
show examples
.
This
can clearly be seen from the latest survey done during the COVID pandemic by education experts, which showed that,
although
children
did not meet all the needs of their school, they not only scored higher grades but
also
reported a better understanding of concepts with
home
-based
technology assisted
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technology-assisted
show examples
learning. A recent study showed
home based
Add a hyphen
home-based
show examples
work
and education
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
preferred by over 70% of the
people
in America
due to
the
avaliability
Correct your spelling
availability
of the required
technology
at any place
during
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at
show examples
anytime
Replace the word
any time
show examples
.
This
clearly
higlights
Correct your spelling
highlights
the fact that
technology
has helped
people
work
at
anytime
Replace the word
any time
show examples
even
duirng
Correct your spelling
during
the
nights
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night
show examples
or even during their
lesiure
Correct your spelling
leisure
time
being
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
in any location around the globe. The
world wide
Correct your spelling
worldwide
show examples
avaliability
Correct your spelling
availability
of new technologies
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
show examples
people
not only to
work
at a pace suitable for them but
also
gives them a less stressful environment.
Nevertheless
,
it is clear that
home based
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home-based
show examples
work
and education
due to
latest
Correct article usage
the latest
show examples
technologies
improves
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improve
show examples
the efficiency in which
people
work
, which improves the
overall
output of the company.
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Task Response
Ensure a balanced discussion on both positive and negative aspects, even if you lean towards one. It enriches your argument.
Task Response
Incorporate more specific examples from your personal experience or widely recognized studies to support your points, enhancing the effectiveness of your argument.
Coherence & Cohesion
Maintain your focus on cohesively linking ideas throughout your essay. Transitions between paragraphs were well-handled, but the connection between some sentences within paragraphs could be smoother.
Coherence & Cohesion
Consider a brief conclusion summarizing your key points and reiterating your stance clearly, which reinforces your argument's impact.
Introduction
The introduction clearly presents the topic and your perspective, setting a strong foundation for the essay.
Logical Structure
Logical organization of paragraphs with clear main ideas in each, contributing to an effective argument structure.
Supported Main Points
The use of a real-world example (a study during the COVID pandemic) adds weight to your argument, showcasing the effectiveness of remote learning.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • remote work
  • e-learning
  • accessibility
  • inclusive
  • productivity
  • personalized learning
  • disciplined routine
  • interpersonal skills
  • cybersecurity
  • sustainability
  • work-life balance
  • physical disabilities
What to do next:
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