Good planning is the key sector to success. To what extent do you agree?
Nowadays,
Cyber bullying
has become a huge issue for young Correct your spelling
Cyberbullying
adosenlets
in the world. Cyberbullying is Correct your spelling
adolescents
hassament
by using digital technology Correct your spelling
harassment
testament
such
as social networks or on
messaging apps. The behaviour of Change preposition
apply
people
who do this
is to intimidate, or blame the person being bullied. The purpose of this
essay is to explain the reason why this
situation happened, the effect
of cyberbullying at a young age and what we can do to prevent this
situation.
The foremost factor that made this
problem grow is that people
think it is common to just prank or joke with someone but they don’t realise it is actually harassment.
Secondly
, according to
the paper from John (2019) said
Young Verb problem
apply
people
who experience cyberbullying are at a greater risk than those who don’t for both self-harm and suicidal behaviors
. Change the spelling
behaviours
Therefore
, The significant negative effect
was happen
with the young Change the verb form
happened
people
are issue
in the mental health Add an article
an issue
such
as anxiety, depression and it will became
a cause of suicide
Change the verb form
become
First,
there are many ways to prevent children
from cyberbullying. The way best is Advertiser should monitor your
young Correct pronoun usage
their
people
because of
young Change preposition
apply
people
don’t realise in
the problem or how can protect Change preposition
apply
by
Change preposition
apply
ownself
from bullying. Correct pronoun usage
themselves
Moreover
, the best way to make your children
take responsibility is to help other people
.
In conclusion, the main reason for the increase in cyberbullying is the common behaviour of the
Correct article usage
apply
people
who use social media without awareness of the effect
on other people
who get the message. Additionally
, The significant negative effect
from
cyberbullying is Change preposition
of
people
's mental health. Finally
, the guardian or advertiser should pay attention to protect
them by screening their Wrong verb form
protecting
children
social media accounts and Change noun form
children's
make
sure their Wrong verb form
making
children
responsibility is to help other Change noun form
children's
people
.Submitted by hsmkashi on
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Grammar & Spelling
Be mindful of spelling and grammatical errors, as they can distract from your argument. For example, 'adolenets' should be 'adolescents', and 'hassament' should be 'harassment'.
Tone
Work on maintaining a formal tone throughout the essay. Avoid informal language or overly casual phrases that might detract from the seriousness of the topic.
Sentence Complexity
Use more varied and complex sentence structures to enrich your writing and demonstrate a higher level of English proficiency.
Supporting Evidence
Incorporate direct quotes or more detailed examples to support your arguments. This could strengthen your essay by providing concrete evidence to back up your points.
Topic Understanding
Your essay effectively identifies and discusses the important issue of cyberbullying, showing a good understanding of the topic.
Structure
You structured your essay well, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which helped in conveying your message cohesively.
Use of References
Including a reference, even if not detailed, shows an effort to support your arguments with external sources, which adds to your essay's credibility.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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