Some people believe that teenagers are facing more problems in their life than they did in the past and this is because parents are spending more time at work than at home. Do you agree or disagree?

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in recent times the work
take
Change the verb form
takes
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
several
time
Use synonyms
from parents that
effect
Correct your spelling
affect
show examples
behaviour of
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
childern
Correct your spelling
children
and
there
Replace the word
their
show examples
relationship
bewteen
Correct your spelling
between
parents and children , some people calm that
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
a big negative and
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
strongly agree with that opinion in
this
Linking Words
essay
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
will give some
reasones
Correct your spelling
reasons
and
demostrate
Correct your spelling
demonstrate
forthermore
Correct your spelling
furthermore
.
to begin
Linking Words
with, there are various cons that can
effect
Correct your spelling
affect
show examples
directly and
non directly
Add a hyphen
non-directly
show examples
children
Change noun form
children's
show examples
need to spend
time
Use synonyms
with
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
parents every day to increase
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
take and relationship and several
active
Replace the word
activities
show examples
that
relying
Wrong verb form
rely
show examples
in
Change the preposition
on
upon
show examples
them , in some
government
Fix the agreement mistake
governments
show examples
they begin to decline the
time
Use synonyms
for families in there work so kids can spend more
time
Use synonyms
together and can improve the happy and healthy of society .
Secondly
Linking Words
, the trouble will
more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
increase
Correct word choice
because childern
show examples
childern
Correct your spelling
children
will begin to find some people to
take
Verb problem
talk
show examples
with and
make
Verb problem
apply
show examples
a relationship with some of them can be bad and
make
Verb problem
apply
show examples
them have some drawbacks.
to sum up
Linking Words
, all these can
Rephrase
greatly effect
show examples
effect
Correct your spelling
affect
show examples
vere extremely in there characters in futers so
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
families
shoud
Correct your spelling
should
spend
time
Use synonyms
with
there
Replace the word
their
show examples
kids
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
the weekends to
rise
Verb problem
strengthen
show examples
there
Replace the word
their
show examples
relationships with them .
Submitted by abdulelah.gh3 on

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structure
Try to structure your essay more clearly with distinct introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Each paragraph should have one main idea.
grammar/spelling
Work on grammar and spelling to improve the clarity of your ideas. Errors can make it difficult for the reader to understand.
examples
Use more specific examples to support your points. Examples help to illustrate your arguments and make them more convincing.
coherence
Focus on developing a more coherent argument by linking your ideas together more effectively. Use transition words to help with the flow of the essay.
position
You provided a clear position on the topic.
organization
Attempted to organize ideas into paragraphs.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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