Young people are often influenced in their behaviors by others in the same age group. Some argue that peer pressure is important while others feel it has distinct disadvantages. Do the disadvantages of peer pressure outweigh the advantages?

#people #behaviors #age #group #argue #peer #pressure

In adolescence, various

behaviors

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behaviours

show examples

Change the verb form

are

show examples

had

youngsters

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by youngsters

show examples

ranging from good or bad

behaviors

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behaviours

show examples

. These

behaviors

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behaviours

show examples

of young people of the same age are able to affect others. Some believe that

peer

pressure

is necessary,

while

others feel

this

can

brings

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bring

show examples

adverse effects. Despite

advantages

Correct article usage

the advantages

show examples

, the disadvantages of

this

issue are more significant.

Sosial

Correct your spelling

Social

pressure

plays an important role in the growth of individuals and can spur motivation to achieve goals.

Peer

pressure

that has been successful in achieving his or her goals can make us more passionate about what we want to achieve.

Furthermore

, seeing the kind nature of our friends can encourage our

behavior

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behaviour

show examples

towards better

things

such

as studying hard, being consistent in doing sports, or getting involved in community service. Young people are often influenced in their

behavior

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behaviour

show examples

by others because they want to fit in with their friends.

However

peer

pressure

can lead to negative

behaviors

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behaviours

show examples

such

as drug abuse or risky activities.

This

is done simply because they want to be accepted into a group of the same age.

In addition

peer

pressure

from academic achievers can set the standard for success.

For example

, parents often compare and force us to follow the achievements of friends our age who excel in academics, but

on the other hand

, we master

things

in non-academic fields.

This

makes us depressed and not focused on doing the

things

we love. In conclusion, it seems to me that the disadvantages of

this

issue are more significant.

This

includes

peer

pressure

, which can lead to negative

behaviors

Change the spelling

behaviours

show examples

such

as drug abuse or risky activities and make us depressed and not focused on doing the

things

we love.

Submitted by bonarpasaribuu on Wed May 01 2024

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language proficiency

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task achievement

A clear stance on the topic with a balanced discussion.

coherence cohesion

Effective introduction and conclusion linking back to the essay question.

task achievement

Good use of examples to illustrate your points on peer pressure's impact.

Your opinion

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

276 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

influence
behavior
age group
peer pressure
distinct
advantages
disadvantages
motivate
excel
positive behaviors
substance abuse
bullying
risky activities
belonging
acceptance
anxiety
stress
low self-esteem
conform
individuality
personal growth
decision-making skills
situations
resist
healthy balance
personal development

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Young people are often influenced in their behaviors by others in the same age group. Some argue that peer pressure is important while others feel it has distinct disadvantages. Do the disadvantages of peer pressure outweigh the advantages?

Your opinion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In many countries, a financial crime involving identity theft is increasing. What are the causes of this trend, and what effects does it identity theft has on the victims involved?

Many employees are able to work at home due to modern technology. Some people claim that it can benefit only the workers, not the employers. Is it a positive or negative development?

Zoos are sometimes seen as necessary but poor alternative to a natural environment Is it necessary to keep animals in zoos

Some people think that sport teaches children how to compete, while others believe that children learn teamwork. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people believe that violence on television and in computer games has a damaging effect on the society. Others deny that these factors have any significant influence on people's behaviour. What is your opinion?