For some people, shopping is not just about buying what is necessary, but is a form of entertainment. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?
in recent times ,
shoping
Correct your spelling
shopping
begin
important in our Wrong verb form
has become
life
and Fix the agreement mistake
lives
its begin
a tradition in Correct your spelling
it has become
the
society Correct article usage
apply
people
shoping every time online or Change preposition
in others
others
ways ,some Correct quantifier usage
other
people
believe that shopping brings
several cons in Verb problem
has
life
, and in another view say its
fine , in Correct your spelling
it is
this
essay i
agree with the firs view I will demonstrate that forther and give reasons.
Change the capitalization
I
to begin
with , shopping online begin
overrunning Wrong verb form
has begun
in
our modern Change preposition
apply
life
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
make
the situation Change the verb form
makes
more
easier for the individual and the exposure Change the word
apply
of
ideas and Change preposition
to
material
can Fix the agreement mistake
materials
influnce
in our thoughts and behaviour , Correct your spelling
influence
for
example
some Add a comma
example,
people
buying
things that they Wrong verb form
buy
not
need Change the verb form
do not
did not
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
such
us puing
Correct your spelling
putting
a
new clothes because just seeing it in online .
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
secondly
, shopping can impact in
the Change preposition
apply
stayle
and the way we live so things that Correct your spelling
style
state
an
necessary change Change the article
a
from
the person and in time cant be clear if the material Change preposition
for
realy
Correct your spelling
really
need
it or not , Change the verb form
needs
in
addition
that Add the comma(s)
addition,
cost
a lot Wrong verb form
costs
from
his time ,energy, and important thing money because when the individual had several things he Change preposition
of
cant
Change the verb form
cants
foucs
in the important thing in his Correct your spelling
focus
life
.
to sum up
, people
enjoy shopping Correct word choice
whether if
if its
online or going Correct your spelling
it is
Change preposition
to shops
shops
all these can change the way and Correct subject-verb agreement
shop
the
behaviour , if the Change the word
their
individaual foucs
Correct your spelling
individual focuses
in
what is important in his Change preposition
on
life
.Submitted by abdulelah.gh3 on
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Task Achievement
Try to clearly introduce your topic and state your opinion in the introduction to give the reader a clear understanding of your stance from the beginning.
Task Achievement
Use examples to support your points more effectively. Specific instances can help illustrate your views and strengthen your argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
Organize your ideas more logically. Each paragraph should contain one main idea and subsequent sentences should support that idea.
Coherence and Cohesion
Make sure your conclusion effectively summarizes your main points and restates your opinion in a clear manner.
General
Work on improving grammatical accuracy and range of vocabulary. This will help in making your essay more coherent and engaging.
General
You've engaged with the topic in a personal and reflective manner, showing an understanding of the effects of shopping on modern life.
Content
You've managed to touch upon several relevant issues related to shopping, indicating a good grasp of the topic's complexity.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.