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Band 4.5

In many cities planers tendto arange shops,schools,offices and homes in specific areas and separate them from each other .Do you think theadventages of this police outweight the disadvantages

#cities #planers #tendto #arange #shops #schools #offices #homes #areas #theadventages #police #outweight
Nowadays , building industries getting their popularity to build widespread subjects
such
 as education centres or accommodation in an intended location. They came up with the idea in order to
copy
Correct your spelling
cope
show examples
 with a high percentage of
urbanization
as well as
 provide better
conditionals
Replace the word
conditions
show examples
 for those part of
world's
Correct article usage
the world's
show examples
 population who live in villages.In
this
 exam, I will examine the benefits of
this
 trend .
To begin
with
Add a comma
with,
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 one of the most essential issues for the industries is
urbanization
 which point experienced an
increadable
Correct your spelling
incredible
 increase .
In other words
, engineers
frustrate
Wrong verb form
are frustrated
show examples
 with not only limited space to create but
also
 caring about providing development equipment for those who live in
city
corners
 .
For example
 , In my country, there are more than ten building companies
who
Correct pronoun usage
that
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 used to concentrate their investment
neither
Change preposition
in neither
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 regions nor
countryside
Correct article usage
the countryside
show examples
.
As a result
 ,
CHILDRENS IN
Correct your spelling
children in
CITY
CORNERS
 ARE not able to be educated OR HAVE
CURIOSITY
Correct article usage
a CURIOSITY
show examples
 lifestyle COMPARE TO
CAPITALS
Correct article usage
the CAPITALS
show examples
. so man needs to move to a capital , which become more and more crowded . In order to grow up with
this
 the freelancers started to work out on conditionals for
city
corners
.
Thus
 , with a purpose to cope with a high degree of
urbanization
, private companies tend to concentrate their force on low-developed areas . More importantly , if
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Fix the agreement mistake
businessmen
show examples
businessman
Fix the agreement mistake
businessmen
show examples
Correct subject-verb agreement
influences
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influence
Correct subject-verb agreement
influences
show examples
city
Change noun form
corners'
corner's
show examples
corners
Change noun form
corners'
show examples
 development , they will be able to have
income
 for themselves. They will construct
Add an article
a
show examples
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
 for challenges
such
 as malls that would be brand new for inhabitants of the village . As a
consequences
Correct the article-noun agreement
consequence
show examples
, they will have both contributed to its popularity and provided high figures of
income
 for the
frelancers
Correct your spelling
freelancers
.
For example
 , In New Zealand more individuals from
countryside
Correct article usage
the countryside
show examples
 visit department stores and malls compared with monopolised cities . In
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
another
Fix the agreement mistake
other
show examples
wordwords
Correct your spelling
words
, a corporation has made both charities by improving the
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
 of people from those poor statistics and
also
 improving their own work .
therefore
 , if village households are improved it will have advantages for both sides . in conclusion , I consider that
such
 aims as
urbanization
 , charity and
income
 contribute
planers
Change preposition
to planers
show examples
 to arrange facilities not only for centres but
also
 for villages in order to take an
income
 and realize better equipment for villages.
Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on

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Task Achievement
Remember to address both advantages and disadvantages of the topic to fully respond to the question.
Coherence & Cohesion
Work on structuring your essay with a clear introduction, at least two or three body paragraphs each focusing on one main idea, and a concise conclusion for better coherence.
Coherence & Cohesion
Use paragraphs effectively to separate your introduction, each of your main points, and your conclusion.
Language Accuracy
Double-check your work for typos, grammatical issues, and ensure clarity in expression. This will enhance the overall quality of your writing.
Content
You provided relevant examples to support your points, which strengthens your argument.
Relevance
The essay touches on important aspects like urbanization, making it relevant to the prompt.
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