Some people argue that it is the responsibility of the police to educate children about good behavior, whereas others believe that parents should be responsible for children. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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In the present day, the responsibility of educating children should belong to their parents regarding learning about good behaviour

whereas

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some believe

this

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issue may be under the control of the police.

This

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essay will describe both aspects with some detailed examples including my opinions.

Firstly

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, I strongly believe that an important part of the parent role is taking care of their children,particularly teaching them what necessary they need to know.

For example

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, if the youths are not satisfied with something wrong they cannot hit or attack others like when they were small kids because

this

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reflection is not good behaviour at all times.

Moreover

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, parents are a couple of family members who are literally close to their offspring the most;

thus

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,it is an inevitable duty to give them recommendations.

Secondly

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, I think the outsiders, not a member of the family, could not considerably convince them to go in the right direction as they might not simply trustful them.

Finally

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,they are likely to trust someone who is more reliable.

On the other hand

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, some think

this

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duty should be taken by the force. I personally agree with part of

this

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,but not in total. The police are able to take the educational responsibility through some special occasions. They might communicate with adolescents by publishing a special campaign.

For instance

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, the campaign to resist any illegal drug should be published to the public as a fundamental basis of society, to always remind them to not be involved with those terrible things at all.

To conclude

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, in my opinion, the main responsibility for educating good behaviour should be in the control of the parents rather than the police,which has a smaller impact on the offspring's actions.

However

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, both of them are a part of

this

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crucial step of personal growth.

phanphetporThu May 02 2024

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Introduction

Ensure your introduction clearly presents the essay topic and your perspective. Try to outline briefly both views and your stance to make your argument structure more transparent from the beginning.

Coherence

Use a wider range of linking words to improve the flow between sentences and paragraphs. This will enhance the readability and coherence of your essay.

Conclusion

In the conclusion, restate your opinion more forcefully to leave a strong impression on the reader. Summarize the key points of both views before stating your final stance.

Supporting Arguments

Continue to include relevant examples to support your points; consider incorporating more detailed scenarios or data when possible to strengthen your argument.

Engagement

You have engaged with the essay topic effectively, discussing both sides of the argument before stating your own opinion.

Structure

Your essay has a logical structure, with clear paragraphs that each address a specific aspect of the debate.

Example Usage

The real-world examples you provided add credibility to your arguments and help illustrate your points clearly.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

296 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

responsibility
educating
good behavior
role
primary
collaboration
well-rounded
education
enforcing
balancing
advantages
disadvantages
mentor
guidance
discipline
supportive
law enforcement
positive influence
legal authority
parental involvement
community-oriented

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Some people argue that it is the responsibility of the police to educate children about good behavior, whereas others believe that parents should be responsible for children. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Health services are a basic necessity. However, private companies have made them quite costly for ordinary individuals. Do the advantages of private health care outweigh its disadvantages?

Some people believe that reading stories from a book is better than watching TV or playing computer games for children. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Convenience foods will become increasingly prevalent and eventually replace traditional foods and tradition methods of food preparation. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

In recent years, many governments have brought in laws to ban smoking in public places, such as bars, restaurents and offices. To what extent do you agree or disagree with banning smoking in public places?

Many people believe that educational standards have declined in recent times, particularly in area of literacy and numeracy. Discuss the causes of this problem and offer some possible solutions to it.