some people think that to be successful , you need to get in a university degree. where as others say it is not true. discuss both ideas and give your opinion ?
in recent times
the
Correct article usage
a
University
degree is important for those that individual what to work in some company , but some people Use synonyms
calm
they Verb problem
say
not
need it to be successful they can do Change the verb form
do not
did not
there
Correct your spelling
their
whone
company or something else , and Correct your spelling
own
i
agree with Change the capitalization
I
second
view in Change the article
the second
this
essay i will demonstrate that .
Linking Words
to begin
with , we can see Linking Words
company’s
need Change the noun form
companies
company
the
degree Correct article usage
a
of
Change preposition
from
Use synonyms
University
for a lot of things to Correct article usage
a University
be understanding
how the individual thinks and Wrong verb form
understand
there
level of Replace the word
their
his
capabilities so in Correct pronoun usage
apply
this
Linking Words
situations
Fix the agreement mistake
situation
university
degree will impact directly Use synonyms
in
work if Change preposition
apply
wil
Correct your spelling
will
accepted
or not , Add a missing verb
be accepted
for
Linking Words
example
some Add the comma(s)
example,
company’s
need an engineer so they Fix the agreement mistake
companies’s
wants
to Change the verb form
want
se
his background in his career.
Correct your spelling
see
use
in
the Change preposition
On
another
hand , several individuals Correct quantifier usage
other
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
dont
have the Correct your spelling
don't
dgree
or they Correct your spelling
degree
didint
have the opportunity to get it , in Correct your spelling
didn't
this
situation we will see Linking Words
its
Correct pronoun usage
it
can
Correct your spelling
an
effect
in both negative and Correct your spelling
affect
in
positive Change preposition
apply
way
Fix the agreement mistake
ways
for example
if the individual can be a creative person and make his path to success Linking Words
such
Linking Words
us
a several successful people in live not all of them had a Correct your spelling
as
dgree
like Steve jobs and other like him .
Correct your spelling
degree
to sum up
, Linking Words
University
Use synonyms
dgree
Correct your spelling
degree
its
important to people Correct your spelling
is
that
Correct word choice
apply
they
want to find Correct pronoun usage
who
job
in modern life but its not necessary to be a successful person we can see vividly a Add an article
a job
individual
that Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
change
Wrong verb form
changed
the
life and they didn’t study at Change the word
their
university
.Use synonyms
Submitted by abdulelah.gh3 on
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Introduction
Try to clarify and expand your introduction to provide a clearer overview of your essay's direction. This helps readers understand your stance and the points you plan to discuss.
Structure
Work on the structure and organization of your essay. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea, supported by examples or further explanation. This enhances coherence and cohesion.
Grammar & Spelling
Remember to proofread your writing for grammatical errors and typos. Consistent errors can distract from your message and reduce clarity.
Examples & Details
Including more specific examples and explanations can strengthen your argument. Though you mention Steve Jobs, adding a couple more examples with brief explanations would make your argument more convincing.
Task Response
You've addressed both views of the argument, which is essential for this type of essay.
Conclusion
Your conclusion summarizes your stance clearly, which is a key component of a strong essay.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.