Due to traffic and housing problems in the cities, the government encourages businesses to move to the rural area. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

In recent years, the number of businesses that have moved to rural
areas
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has increased. Some people claim that investing in
areas
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with almost no competition can help businesses gain more profit,
while
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others firmly believe that low access to basic facilities and poor level of infrastructure can be too severe.
This
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essay will elucidate both sides of
this
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argument and conclude whether the benefits exceed the disadvantages.
To begin
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with, it is evident that level of the competition in cities can be very high.
Therefore
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, small companies can't find their client base.
Thus
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, they often lose more money than they gain.
Nevertheless
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, the countryside is an unexplored land for business owners and their ideas.
Additionally
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, clients from rural
areas
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are not picky and will be happy with almost any product they are offered.
For example
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, recent research has revealed that 90% of small businesses doubled their sales after they moved to the countryside.
However
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, I think it is obvious that the countryside is an undeveloped part of the country and it has problems with infrastructure. Basic healthcare facilities can be too remote from each other making accidents at work more deadly. Medical aid doctors need to travel longer distances in order to reach the victim's destination.
As a result
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, they are often too late and the patient is already dead.
For instance
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, 70% of people who died because of the heart attack lived in rural
areas
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. In conclusion, after analyzing both sides of
this
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debate I came to the conclusion that the drawbacks of having a business in the rural area are too severe to be outweighed by the advantages.

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task achievement
Improve the clarity of your arguments in the main body paragraphs to ensure that each point clearly supports your thesis.
coherence
Consider varying your sentence structures for greater fluency and to maintain the reader's interest.
structure
You have provided a clear introduction and a conclusion that summarizes your argument effectively.
content
Your use of relevant examples strengthens your arguments, particularly the statistics provided.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general
Topic Vocabulary:
  • urban congestion
  • housing crisis
  • economic development
  • job creation
  • operational expenses
  • transport infrastructure
  • quality of life
  • spacious living
  • cultural vibrancy
  • profitability
  • infrastructure challenges
  • commute times
  • air pollution
  • rural revitalization
  • local economy
What to do next:
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