Many people say that universities should only be offered to young students with high marks,others say that they should accept people of all ages,even if they did not do well.Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Whilst many
people
think that only young talented students can attend universities, I believe that
people
of all ages and talents should have
this
opportunity to go to university to
study
. On the one hand, a
student
who attends a major in university is a burden to the
government
, and the
government
should spend some considerable money on any
student
. So, governments, which have limited resources, should invest money in a profitable
student
. with some rational thinking, you can say a young
student
with high marks are potentially good choice for their authority and only they should be in an educational institution.
For instance
,
last
year our
government
put a huge budget for universities to train future professionals, so, that investment should be back to them in the future with some profit
that is
advanced in any aspects of knowledge in our country.
However
, every individual should have the chance to reach their potential and personal growth,
therefore
, nobody does not have the right to prevent others from their rights. The right to
study
freely is one of the main rights of humans, but if the
government
choose only young
people
to
study
, they take others' rights. In my opinion, by giving
this
opportunity to everyone, governments can invest better for the future because maybe some older
people
have more talent than younger ones.
For example
, in our country, the
government
have started teaching old
people
in the
last
decades and it brings some light to our community. In conclusion, despite the fact that allowing every individual to
study
at university our education system may cost more money, it gives everyone particularly old
people
a new chance to start again and gain knowledge.
Submitted by mehdikarimi0811 on

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Introduction enhancement
Try to begin your essay with a more engaging introduction, perhaps by including a general statement about the importance of education before introducing the debate.
Coherence improvement
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Balancing discussion and opinion
In terms of task achievement, make sure to discuss both views equally and thoroughly before giving your own opinion. Your own opinion should be clearly differentiated and supported with reasons.
Vocabulary and sentence complexity
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Task understanding
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Use of examples
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Effective conclusion
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