People can live and work anywhere they want to choose, because of improved communication technology and transport. Do the advantages of this development outweigh disadvantages?
It has been observed that urban people can select to live and work in places they want,
due to
the development of communication technology and vehicle. Despite the numerous arguments surrounding this
topic, my viewpoint on this
issue is that merits
of Correct article usage
the merits
this
matter surpass its possible drawbacks.
The advantages of the improvement of talking equipments
and traffic are undeniable and manifold. The first benefit is that it exposes us to great house resources and Change the wording
equipment
types of equipment
pieces of equipment
colorful
experiences, which Change the spelling
colourful
stiumlates
us to be more active, and broaden our horizons. We may Correct your spelling
stimulates
stimulate
stimulated
also
be motivated to
existing norms and values, and even generate breakthrough innovations and achievements. Change preposition
by
Secondly
, it is undeniable that growth
of speaking Correct article usage
the growth
technique
and transportation in a country is a commendable Fix the agreement mistake
techniques
behavior
that can generate positive outcomes for individuals and society. Change the spelling
behaviour
This
behavior
manifests social responsibility and Change the spelling
behaviour
humanitarian
spirit. As Correct article usage
a humanitarian
this
not only enhances the relationship between people, but also
beneficial
their daily travel. Replace the word
benefits
For example
, a person and their friends living in different cities can also
see each other's faces through mobile phone videos, or see each other at the fastest speed with taking a plane.
However
, there is a disadvantage is that paying extra for talking
technology research or travel, may exert unexpected financial pressure upon citizens, Verb problem
apply
especiallly
those in developing regions, where the income level and living standard are relatively low. Correct your spelling
especially
This
may cause them to suffer from financial stress and hardship, which could affect their quality of life and well-being. Furthermore
, one of the possible solutions to this
problem is to allocate more funds to the community services and government sectors. By increasing the capital inflow, people can gain car discounts and free calls.
In summary, I believe that the benefits of this
matter largely surpass the drawbacks, as it possesses remarkable advantages and the demerits are manageable.Submitted by cathyielts22 on
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Vocabulary Development
Keep working on using a wider range of vocabulary to express your ideas more accurately. While 'talking equipments' and 'growth of speaking technique' convey the intended meaning, terms like 'communication technology' and 'development of transportation systems' could provide a clearer and more professional expression.
Sentence Variety
Try to provide more diverse sentence structures to enhance readability and coherence. While your essay demonstrates a good understanding of the task, variety in sentence construction can make your arguments more engaging.
Relevance of Examples
Ensure that your examples and points are directly related to the topic. While the reference to mobile phone videos and plane travel is relevant, further elaboration on how these specifically impact living and working choices would strengthen your argument.
Balanced Argument
Your essay clearly addresses both the advantages and disadvantages, maintaining a balanced view throughout.
Effective Conclusion
You successfully conclude your essay by restating your viewpoint, which helps in reinforcing your argument effectively.
Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic
Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.
You essay structure should look something like this:
- Introduction
- Body paragraph 1 – Problems
- Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
- Conclusion
Examples to start your body paragraph:
- One of the first problems of the...
- Another problem that needs to be considered...
- A possible solution to this problem would be...
- One immediate practical solution is to...