The internet has transformed the way information is shared and consumed, but it has also created problems that did not exist before. What are the most serious problems associated with the internet and what solutions can you suggest?

The internet has indeed made our lives easy by storing all kinds of important information and useful documents are just one click away, but it has
also
created difficulties that never existed ever before.
This
essay discusses in detail that not only the problem of
data
leaks has threatened our safety but
also
the solution of reporting the incident to police and higher authorities to avoid any future incidents.
To begin
with, the internet has created a safe space for everyone to store all of their important
data
and confidential files and because of
this
, we do not have to rummage through our wardrobe to search for crucial papers.
Moreover
,
this
has made it easy for cybercriminals to leak
data
.
For example
, bank accounts are now linked with multiple applications and with
password
Add an article
a password
the password
show examples
, you can transfer money.
The online
Correct article usage
Online
show examples
fraud has the expertise to manipulate the general population over the phone and ask for their password. It just takes a few seconds for them to withdraw hard-earned money. To overcome
this
problem, people should report directly to their local police department. The police have ensured the public that no one will have to suffer the loss of their precious
data
.
For instance
, a team of cyber experts can track small pieces of information and
thus
, the criminals can be caught and punished.
To sum up
everything, it is quite evident that the
data
leak is the most dreaded drawback of the internet and the appropriate solution to
this
problem is reporting the crime to senior authorities.
Submitted by chelsipurohit.12 on

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coherence cohesion
Your essay provides a clear structure with a smooth flow of ideas, which is positive. However, linking phrases could be used more effectively to create stronger connections between ideas.
task achievement
You've addressed the topic, but expanding on the range of issues associated with the internet, apart from data leaks, could provide a more comprehensive response to the task. Consider including more examples and exploring additional problems and solutions.
coherence cohesion
Introduction and conclusion are present, but they could be strengthened. The introduction could more explicitly state the issues and solutions to be discussed, while the conclusion could more effectively summarize the main points made.
task achievement
Effectively used specific examples to support your point about internet security and fraud, which strengthens your argument.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes your argument, reaffirming your stance on the issue and proposed solution.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • cybersecurity
  • phishing
  • identity theft
  • misinformation
  • fake news
  • social isolation
  • internet addiction
  • data privacy
  • digital literacy
  • regulations
  • awareness programs
  • manipulate
  • proliferation
  • consent
  • escalated
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