Since most information about culture and history can be found online, museums and art galleries are no longer needed. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#information #culture #history #museums #art #galleries

Media has an integral part in information ages. It is,

therefore

, not surprising to see how it has caused a controversy among

people

about the museums and art galleries

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

must

Correct article usage

a must

show examples

for cultural and historical information or not. Some

people

firmly support their argument,

others

Correct word choice

while others

show examples

adamantly object to it. I have solid reasons to agree with both two of which are online sources are numerous and attending to opening galleries a social activity for

people

To begin

with,

supporter

Fix the agreement mistake

supporters

show examples

this

matter

claim that

media

Correct article usage

the media

show examples

is the best invention after

slice

Replace the word

slicing

show examples

bread for getting information.

This

is a very convincing argument because there are numerous sources about historical heritage

such

as videos, serious, documentaries, recorded voices,

resources

Correct word choice

and resources

show examples

. It may be argued that

this

is very important as online sources are not only unlimited but

also

available for everyone and, every time.

For example

, in the

corona

Correct your spelling

coronavirus

show examples

pandemic,

citizen

Fix the agreement mistake

citizens

show examples

visit

museum

Fix the agreement mistake

museums

show examples

online for free by the Internet.

Thus

, accessibility plays a significant role in

this

issue. In brief, the advocate of

this

matter

points out that spending money

for

Change preposition

show examples

real museums and art galleries is unnecessary since they strongly claim

this

is rational.

On the other hand

, opponents of

this

matter

have a different point of view. They emphasize that visiting

this

Correct determiner usage

these

show examples

places directly

effect

Correct your spelling

affect

show examples

understandability

Correct article usage

the understandability

show examples

of history or culture.

This

also

a quite satisfactory argument depending on

fact

Add an article

the fact

show examples

that each skills work together for imagination

the

Change preposition

in the

show examples

age of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

history. It is worth stating that

this

is a persuasive point as visiting

this

place is a social activity for

people

This

Change the determiner

These

show examples

places are

bedrock

Add an article

the bedrock

show examples

of sharing ideas and

brain storming

Correct your spelling

brainstorming

show examples

. In short, it can be concluded that aspect many

as well as

To conclude

people

have a totally different perspective

about

Change preposition

show examples

this

matter

Nevertheless

, when everything is taken into consideration, I am inclined to believe that there should be

delicate

Add an article

a delicate

show examples

balance between these two arguments.

Submitted by emiretatli7 on Sat May 04 2024

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Structure

Ensure your essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion to guide the reader through your argument. Your conclusion was quite brief and could be developed further.

Grammar

Be mindful of sentence structure and grammar to enhance the clarity of your arguments.

Examples

Expand on your examples to clearly connect them to your argument, providing more depth to your reasoning and illustrations.

Balanced Argument

Maintain a more balanced and detailed discussion in your argument. While you've attempted to address both sides of the argument, there could be more detail and depth in examining each perspective.

Balance

You have made a good attempt to discuss both sides of the argument, which is essential for a balanced essay.

Use of Examples

Using examples, such as the accessibility of museums during the corona pandemic, is a strong point in your essay. It helps to ground your argument in real-world contexts.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
22Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

316 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

immersive
hands-on experience
interactive exhibits
preservation
cultural and historical artifacts
safeguarded
community engagement
heritage
authenticity
curated exhibits
scholarly input
misinformation
economic impact
tourism
emotional and aesthetic responses
atmosphere
ambiance

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Since most information about culture and history can be found online, museums and art galleries are no longer needed. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think it would be better for large companies and industry to move to regional areas outside large urban centers. Do you think advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Leaders and directors in an organization are normally older people. Some people think younger leaders would be better. Do you agree or disagree?

In some countries there are more young people choosing to enrol in work-based training instead of attending university. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

nowadays many people have access to computers on a wide basis and a large number of children play computer games. What are the negative impacts of playing computer games and what can be done to minimize the bad effects?

In many countries,there is a growing gap between the technical skills of younger people and those over the age of fifty. What problems does this cause, and what solutions could minimise the problems?