IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3.5

You normally go shopping in the area where you live. However, you think some of the facilites for shoppers could be improved. Write a letter to your local newspaper. In your letter:say in general what you like about shopping in your area , say what is wrong with the facilities, suggest how they can be improved

#area #facilites #shoppers #newspaper #facilities
Dear Sir or Madam, I am
writting
Correct your spelling
writing
 to why,
I
Correct pronoun usage
my
show examples
favorite
Change the spelling
favourite
show examples
shoppings
Correct your spelling
shopping
show examples
 in
aera
Correct your spelling
areas
colesd
Correct your spelling
cold
 to
accomadation
Correct your spelling
accommodation
accommodations
, and recommend
make
Wrong verb form
making
show examples
 improved central shopping, have more
peoples
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
. Usually, I like shopping
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 Because It
relexd
Correct your spelling
relaxed
, do
excersise
Correct your spelling
exercise
,
puchased
Correct your spelling
purchase
 new dress or shoes or gifts for my family. So,
Improtant
Correct your spelling
Important
 near to apartment and public transport. The facilities
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 wrong
such
 as
no
Correct your spelling
not
show examples
have
Wrong verb form
having
show examples
Movie
Correct article usage
a Movie
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thearter
Correct your spelling
theatre
,
Karaoke
Correct article usage
a Karaoke
show examples
 room and
untill
Correct your spelling
until
restaurant
Correct article usage
the restaurant
show examples
2
Add a missing verb
has 2
show examples
shops I think it few . I recommend
have
Change the verb form
having
show examples
 many
restaurant
Change to a plural noun
restaurants
show examples
 for
family
Fix the agreement mistake
families
show examples
 and contract movie
thearter
Correct your spelling
theatres
. I Look forward to hearing from you.
Correct the word
Yours
show examples
Your
Correct your spelling
Yours
show examples
 faithfully, Miss Gun Jo
Submitted by kapokopk on

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Structure
Try to use clear and organized paragraphs for each of your points. This makes your letter more readable and structured.
Grammar & Spelling
Work on grammar and spelling to enhance clarity and professionalism in your writing.
Development
Consider elaborating more on each point to fully address the task requirements. Provide specific examples or reasons.
Tone
Using a more formal tone and appropriate salutations and closings can make your letter more effective.
Content
You clearly expressed your fondness for shopping in your area and pointed out specific areas for improvement.
Initiative
Your initiative to suggest improvements shows constructive engagement with your community.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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