Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think thia is a positive or a negative development?

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It has been witnessed during the past few years that a significant number of people tend to use conventional
medicine
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rather than visiting their family doctor for treatment.
This
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essay will discuss the merits and the demerits and my opinion will be presented as well.
On the other hand
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, some opine that using
medicine
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has side effects in the long term, in the sense that the chemicals will be stored in the liver, which will definitely cause other problems after years.
Besides
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that, they got their information from their ancestors, articles they read on social media or even from watching reels on YouTube.
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not from a medical source.
However
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, it cannot be denied
also
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that some treatments have proved effective.
For example
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, the Chinese air suction cups have effectively relieved pain and cured many diseases that modern
medicine
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could not treat.
On the other hand
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, individuals should be aware that many diseases share similar symptoms, meaning that, specific tests or even X-ray examinations must be done before identifying the exact problem.
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, in some cases, conventional
medicine
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could make the problem worse and could lead to severe pain rather than relieving it. A clear example could be ginger which is known as a natural antibiotic,
however
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excessive consumption of it would certainly raise blood pressure and increase heartbeats.
To sum up
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, the aforementioned points clearly show the advantages and the disadvantages of both methods. Anyway, personally I believe that conventional and modern
medicine
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are effective only if a consultation by a professional is done first to avoid any possible medical problems which may threaten people's lives.
Submitted by nawartomry on

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task response
Improve the clarity of ideas by providing more specific examples or data to support your points. Ensure that you explain both sides of the argument more thoroughly.
coherence cohesion
Work on the logical flow of your essay. Make sure each paragraph transitions well to the next, and that each idea is connected logically.
task response
Good attempt at providing a balanced view by discussing both the benefits and drawbacks of alternative medicine.
coherence cohesion
Clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
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