Some people think that cars are the best way to travel in a city, while others think that bicycle is better. Discuss both points of view and give your opinion

There is a great debate between cars and bicycle is the best mode of transportation to
travel
in a city. Some advocate for the
convenient
Replace the word
convenience
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and comfort of
car
Fix the agreement mistake
cars
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,
while
some champion the ecological and health benefits of
bicycle
Fix the agreement mistake
bicycles
show examples
. I prefer to
travel
in
Change preposition
by
show examples
car
because it is a more relaxing way for me to enjoy
urban
Add an article
the urban
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travel
experience. Cars provide undeniable advantages in urban
travel
. They offer convenience, allowing
individual
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individuals
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to reach destinations faster and carry heavy loads.
Also
, providing a comfortable and sheltered
for
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apply
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environment from adverse weather conditions.
Additionally
, cars can
accomodate
Correct your spelling
accommodate
multiple passengers which
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
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it
Correct pronoun usage
them
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more suitable for family trips.
For example
, people in Hong Kong
loved
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love
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to visit Japan as a family trip because it is very easy and convenient to
travel
within the city by
car
. Bicycles
on
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, on
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the other hand,
is
Verb problem
apply
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a very
environmental
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environmentally
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friendly, they
emitting
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emit
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zero
greendhouse
Correct your spelling
greenhouse
gases.
Furthermore
, it is more cost friendly requiring no fuel expense and minimal maintenance cost. They
also
promote physical health, as cycling
serve
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serves
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as one of the excellent
exercise
Change to a plural noun
exercises
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that can improve cardiovascular health.
For instance
, Taiwan is famous
for
Correct pronoun usage
for its
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“cycling tour” along
their
Correct pronoun usage
its
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coastline, government
invest
Wrong verb form
invested
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lot
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a lot
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of money to promote and attract tourists to join
this
“one of the best cycling tours in the world”. In conclusion,
while
bicycles can provide
a more healthy and eco-friendly urban
Correct the article-noun agreement
more healthy and eco-friendly urban travel experiences
a more healthy and eco-friendly urban travel experience
show examples
travel
experiences, I personally prefer to
travel
with
Change preposition
by
show examples
car
, which can give me a more convenient and comfortable experience to enjoy my time with my family
Submitted by nataliewong313 on

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Sentence Structure
Try to include more complex sentence structures to enhance the sophistication of your essay.
Coherence
Consider using a wider variety of linking words to better connect your ideas and paragraphs.
Task Response
Ensure your examples are directly related to the points you are making for clearer illustration and stronger argumentation.
Introduction & Conclusion
You've done a great job introducing both views and stating your own opinion, which is critical for this task.
Logical Structure
Your essay has a clear logical structure, making it easy to follow your line of reasoning.
Use of Examples
Including specific examples, such as those from Hong Kong and Taiwan, effectively supports your main points.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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