IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

The most effective way to solve traffic and transport problems in the cities is to encourage people from suburbs or the countryside to live in the cities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#traffic #transport #cities #people #suburbs #countryside
The problem of traffic jams has increased dramatically over
past
Correct article usage
the past
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 years, making it almost unbearable for people from distant areas to commute to work in the town. Some say that the preferable way to overcome
this
 challenge is to foster the concentration of population in the cities. I completely disagree with
this
 statement, since I find the mentioned solution inefficient and even harmful to citizens.
Firstly
, a lot of people enjoy living in the countryside, so making them move to the central location may be considered a violation of their aspirations. To cite an example, a vast majority of those who have chosen to settle down in the suburbs see several benefits in their lifestyle, like having better quality of air, lower
level
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levels
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 of noise pollution, and lower rental prices. To my mind, forcing them to change their current homes will not improve their
wellbeing
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well-being
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.
Therefore
, if people do not benefit from the solution, it should not be implied.
Secondly
, even if moving citizens from the remote areas to the central ones somehow improved the situation with traffic congestion,
this
 measure would exacerbate other issues
of
Change preposition
in
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 the big cities.
For instance
, having a lot of newcomers in the capital will inevitably make housing prices
skyrocketing
Wrong verb form
skyrocket
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, so the average standard of living will fall.
Additionally
, overpopulated areas may face difficulties with contamination.
Hence
, I assume that the idea of encouraging migration from one location to another has multiple drawbacks,
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
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 is why other measures to overcome transport difficulties must be found.
To conclude
, I firmly believe that moving individuals from
the
Correct article usage
apply
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distant places to
the
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apply
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towns is neither efficient nor beneficial for
the
Correct article usage
apply
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society. Not only does it have little potential to ease traffic congestion, but it may
also
 worsen the life of
urban
Add an article
the urban
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 population. Another solution must be presented, which should be acceptable for both country and city dwellers.
Submitted by fednastya000 on

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coherence cohesion
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