Some people think that government should change they way individual live, while others believe that they should choose the way themselves. Discuss both points of view and give your opinion.

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the

Correct article usage

apply

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contemporary

society

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, there is

divisive

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a divisive

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opinion, where some folks argue that

government

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should involve in personal

live

Replace the word

lives

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while

Linking Words

others oppose that it should become

Correct article usage

a privacy

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privacy

Replace the word

private

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matter. Personally, I strongly advocate for the latter. Despite there

Verb problem

may

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maybe some merits in the first argument.

This

Linking Words

essay will discuss both viewpoints before arriving at the conclusion. First of all, it is essential to underscore that human

right

Fix the agreement mistake

rights

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is fundamental

for

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show examples

human life.

Use synonyms

Government

Correct article usage

The government

show examples

should consider that individual decision is secured by law.

For instance

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

Change the verb form

are

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able to choose education religion, political views,

job

Fix the agreement mistake

jobs

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, etc without

Add a missing verb

being interupted

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interupted

Correct your spelling

interrupted

by national interest. If

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society

Change noun form

society's

show examples

rights can be self-reliant, they can live peacefully.

Therefore

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

should make

decision

Fix the agreement mistake

decisions

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theirselves

Correct your spelling

themselves

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On the other hand

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, it is irrefutable that human is

socialist

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a socialist

the socialist

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person.

Hence

Linking Words

, the

government

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should arrange law or maybe financial

matter

Fix the agreement mistake

matters

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to ensure justice for the

society

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For example

Linking Words

Use synonyms

government

Add an article

the government

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can

established

Wrong verb form

establish

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vocational

school

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schools

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for poor students

whose

Correct pronoun usage

who

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want to work

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show examples

a cleaning service and give

thim

Correct your spelling

them

financial aid as long as study,

thus

Linking Words

after

Add a comma

graduate,

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graduate

Replace the word

graduation

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they can directly work

which

Change preposition

in which

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suitable

Add a missing verb

is suitable

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with

Change preposition

show examples

their field.

Therefore

Linking Words

, in

this

Linking Words

case

government

Use synonyms

can partially

involve

Wrong verb form

be involved

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in individual

cecision

Correct your spelling

decision

decisions

. In conclusion,

people

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can fully decide their own way

due to

Linking Words

their rights and it should be ensured by law. Meanwhile, the

government

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can

take

Correct your spelling

make

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some

decision

Fix the agreement mistake

decisions

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for

Use synonyms

society

Change noun form

society's

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prosperity. For that reason, it would be better

Change preposition

for that

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that

Correct determiner usage

the

show examples

goverment

Correct your spelling

government

and folks can improve together rather than compete

each

Change preposition

with each

show examples

other.

Thus

Linking Words

, I suggest the

goverment

Correct your spelling

government

should make sure their

people

Use synonyms

prosperity

Add a missing verb

are prosperity

show examples

Linking Words

also

Capitalize word

Also

show examples

people

Use synonyms

should obey the rules that

provided

Add a missing verb

are provided

show examples

Correct article usage

the goverment

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goverment

Correct your spelling

government

to bring

civilized

Correct article usage

a civilized

show examples

society

Use synonyms

patricius.yohanesMon May 06 2024

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examples

Try to further develop your examples with more specifics to strengthen your argument.

language accuracy

Ensure your essay is free from grammatical errors and typos to maintain clarity and professionalism.

language fluency

Consider diversifying your sentence structures for a more engaging and sophisticated writing style.

cohesion

Work on the transition between paragraphs to make the flow of ideas smoother.

task response

You have presented a balanced discussion covering both viewpoints effectively.

intro-conclusion clarity

The introduction and conclusion are clear, summarizing your stance and the discussion points well.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
45
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

268 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

governmental intervention
sustainable living
lifestyle choices
implementing taxes
enforcing regulations
personal freedom
individual responsibility
systemic issues
public health crises
loss of personal freedoms
behavioral change
framework for a healthy environment
judicious blend
protect public health
respect individual freedoms
encourage personal responsibility

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Some people think that the best way to reduce crime is to give longer prison sentences. Others, however, believe there are better alternative ways of reducing crime. Discuss both views and give your opinion.