Some people think that certain old buildings are more worth preserving than other ones. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #buildings #ones

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There is a controversial perspective heating up a debate over whether it is worth preserving antiquated

buildings

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more than other ones or not. From my perspective, I consider myself an advocate of

this

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statement. Without a shadow of a doubt, old

buildings

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play a paramount significant role in human history and culture. And the basis of

this

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is that these architectural antique constructions are historical evidence from many dynasties that contain

cultural

Correct article usage

the cultural

show examples

values of dwellers in that period.

For instance

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, the Temple of Literature and Hue ancient capital can be cited as some of the most outstanding

buildings

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, which are famous tourist destinations containing Vietnamese culture.

In addition

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, those

buildings

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provide us with necessary knowledge about the history of dynasties, which we will not learn in school.

Hence

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, it is essential to protect antiquated structures.

However

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, not all of the antiquated monuments necessitate being preserved. And the explanation for

this

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is that for the time being, there is a wealth of degraded and outdated old

buildings

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that contain dangerous potential for the citizens who live around them .To be specific, the structures in Thanh Cong Street and Lang Ha Street are two characteristic examples.

Hence

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, I assume that the government needs to demolish them, replacing them with apartments or shopping malls which serve human life.

Thus

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, preserving old

buildings

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is not of the essence. In conclusion, certain old

buildings

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are more deserving of preservation than others

due to

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their historical or architectural significance.

IHowever

Correct your spelling

However

, not all ancient

buildings

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are worth preserving, because many old

buildings

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are now degraded and damaged, making them unsafe for people.

Submitted by hominhtrang995 on Mon May 06 2024

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task achievement

The essay presents a clear viewpoint and provides relevant examples to support ideas, which demonstrates a good level of task achievement. However, to enhance clarity, it could focus more on providing detailed, specific examples across each paragraph to reinforce the argument.

coherence cohesion

To improve coherence and cohesion, consider varying sentence structures more and using a wider range of linking words. This would help in making the text flow more naturally and logically.

introduction conclusion

The essay effectively introduces and concludes the topic, clearly stating the writer's position.

logical structure

It maintains a logical structure, systematically discussing reasons and examples to support the main viewpoint.

relevant examples

Relevant examples, such as the Temple of Literature and Hue ancient capital, are used to support arguments, contributing positively to task achievement.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

265 words

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Children are facing more pressures from academic, social and commercial sources. What are the causes of these pressures and what measures should be taken to reduce it?

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