The graph below shows the number of trips made by children in one country to travel to and from school in 1990 and 2010 using various modes of transport. Summarise theinformation by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisonswhere relevant. Travel to and from school by children aged 5-12

#trips #children #country #travel #school #modes #transport #summarise #theinformation #features #comparisonswhere

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The graph illustrates the amount of trips using different transportation that

children

Use synonyms

aged 5 - 12 use to go and back from school in 1990 and 2010.

Overall

Linking Words

, it can be clearly seen that

children

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being a car

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passanger

Correct your spelling

passenger

was the least mode of transport to choose in 1990.

However

Linking Words

children

Use synonyms

as a car

Use synonyms

passanger

Correct your spelling

passenger

became the most favourite in 2010. In terms of an automobile

Use synonyms

passanger

Correct your spelling

passenger

children

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rarely used it in 1990. Accounted for slightly over 4

Use synonyms

millions

Change to singular

million

show examples

per year in 1900, the number of

children

Use synonyms

as a car

Use synonyms

passanger

Correct your spelling

passenger

then

Linking Words

witnessed

Remove the article

apply

show examples

growth to 2.5 times than before, reaching

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

more than 10

Use synonyms

millions

Change to singular

million

show examples

per

years

Fix the agreement mistake

year

show examples

and

became

Wrong verb form

becoming

show examples

the most chosen transportation in 2010.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, walking as the most transportation experienced a significant decrease from over 12

Use synonyms

millions

Change to singular

million

show examples

in 1990 to only half of the number in 2010.

Correct your spelling

Similarly

Similiarly

Correct your spelling

Similarly

, cycling, walking and bus,

as well as

Linking Words

bus

Replace the word

busing

show examples

experienced a downfall to reach just 2

Use synonyms

millions

Change to singular

million

show examples

, 3

Use synonyms

millions

Change to singular

million

show examples

, and 5

Use synonyms

millions

Change to singular

million

show examples

in 2010

Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on Mon May 06 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words children, passanger, millions with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

▼

5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

167 words

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