Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give tour own opinion.

#people #professionals #doctors #engineers #work #country #tour

Their

Replace the word

There

show examples

is a view that people who work in

profession

Replace the word

professional

show examples

sectors should

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

work for the state where they

got

Wrong verb form

get

show examples

financial support or

job

training. Others assert that they should have freedom of occupational choice. I support the latter. There is no doubt that governments support numerous

job

seekers to make them get

Correct article usage

the

show examples

job

Fix the agreement mistake

jobs

show examples

they want successfully in the future.

Therefore

, some people argue that the person who got financial aid or got trained by the projects should

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

work for the nation to pay back.

Furthermore

, if practitioners continue to go abroad and get

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

job

Fix the agreement mistake

jobs

show examples

outside the countries, the nation where they belong could

be falled

Wrong verb form

fall

show examples

Change preposition

into

show examples

bad

Add an article

a bad

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economy

Replace the word

economic

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situation caused by

lack

Correct article usage

a lack

show examples

labours

Correct your spelling

labourers

show examples

Change preposition

show examples

Correct article usage

the

show examples

a working markets

Correct the article-noun agreement

working markets

a working market

show examples

For instance

, a large

numer

Correct your spelling

number

India

Replace the word

Indian

show examples

students who study IT in

India

go to Taiwan or the USA after

grduate

Correct your spelling

graduate

graduated

from school in

India

for looking

Change preposition

to look

show examples

for a

job

This

issue is one of the reasons why

India

remains a poor country.

However

eventhough

Correct your spelling

even though

working abroad causes diverse social problems,

Change the capitalization

show examples

strongly believe that all

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

job

applicants must have

Remove the article

apply

show examples

freedom of occupational choice.

Also

it is clear that

there are abundant advantages.

First,

practitioners,

such

as doctors, can encounter a wider variety of medical cases abroad than domestically, allowing them to broaden their medical knowledge.

This

can contribute to enhancing the reputation of the country they studied in.

In addition

, they can learn

various

Change preposition

about various

show examples

other

nation

Fix the agreement mistake

nations

show examples

cultures and could make

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

forign

Correct your spelling

foreign

friends.

Therefore

Change the capitalization

show examples

assert that all the young applicants should be guaranteed their freedom of

choices

Fix the agreement mistake

choice

show examples

To sum up

while

it is true that there are opposing views on the issue, I believe that whether one works abroad or in their home state should be left to individual choice.

Submitted by jin960524 on Tue May 07 2024

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Grammar & Spelling

Ensure the spelling and grammar are accurate to maintain clarity and professionalism. For example, 'Their is a view' should be 'There is a view,' and 'falled in bad economy situation' should be 'fall into a bad economic situation.'

Tone & Style

Use a more formal tone and vocabulary consistent with academic writing. Avoid contractions (e.g., replace 'i' with 'I') and informal phrases.

Supporting Evidence

To strengthen your arguments, include more detailed examples and evidence. Specific instances can enhance the persuasive power of your points.

Paragraph Structure

Work on paragraph structure to ensure a smooth flow of ideas. Each paragraph should start with a clear topic sentence, followed by supporting sentences, and a concluding remark if needed.

Balanced Discussion

You've adequately discussed both views and provided a clear opinion, which is essential for a balanced answer.

Organization

Efficient use of paragraphing to separate different ideas, which aids in the overall organization of your essay.

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
32Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

296 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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