In some countries there are more young people choosing to enrol in work-based training instead of attending university. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

#countries #people #enrol #university #situation

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In the current age, more and more teenagers deciding to sign up for the

apprenticeship

course in place of going to university. It is vital to understand that the job is necessary for everyone and having an

apprenticeship

can provide the job quickly but people need to have a study process to collect enough knowledge, experience and skills. The most advantageous factor of

apprenticeship

is teenagers just need a little time to study and

then

can have work immediately.

On the other hand

, teenagers can take a job without qualifications and it is suitable for people who do not have enough finances to pay for learning or shoulder their family's economic problems. From prior knowledge, most apprentices are provided accommodation and wages in the time they are still in work-based training,

besides

that, the apprentices can keep working in an

apprenticeship

place after their courses or go to the other place depending on themself.

Thus

, having an

apprenticeship

can give society short-term benefits.

However

, nations that do not attend academies can face a massive problem lack of ability to do jobs requiring expertise. academy courses can produce understanding and improve personal skills,

in contrast

, traineeship gives you experience but not any information.

For example

, among people who join educational institutions more than 70% are received from many companies or businesses and have a successful career but the other have a high unemployment rate.

Consequently

, most of the low-literacy levels residents do not have a successful career. In conclusion, work-based training just brings short-term benefits and an academy is the best way to gain a fulfilling career.

Hence

, having a work course is always effective if you have enough expertise and competencies.

Submitted by Nghỉ hè vui vẻ cả nhà on Tue May 07 2024

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task response

Your essay offers a balanced response to the question and covers both advantages and disadvantages. However, your main points need to be more comprehensively supported with specific examples and elaborations to enhance your argument.

coherence

For better coherence and cohesion, ensure that each paragraph fully develops one central idea. Your introduction could be more clearly articulated to set out the main points that will be discussed in the essay.

cohesion

Transitional phrases can help improve the flow of your essay. Make sure to connect your ideas more seamlessly between and within paragraphs.

task response

Your essay demonstrates an understanding of both sides of the argument, which is a good approach to balancing the discussion.

coherence

Sentence structure and grammar are generally good, which makes your essay easy to read despite the need for further elaboration.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

281 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

work-based training
enrol
university
advantages
disadvantages
practical skills
experience
workforce
employment
earnings
opportunities
further education
theoretical knowledge
career options
exploitation
balance

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In some countries there are more young people choosing to enrol in work-based training instead of attending university. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

In recent years, more and more people are choosing to read e-books rather than paper books. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

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In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

The government should control the amount of violence in films and on television in order to control violent crimes in society. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this action?