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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

TASK 2: In some countries, there has been an increase in the number of parents who are choosing to educate their children themselves at home instead of sending them to school. Do the advantages of home education outweigh the disadvantages?

#countries #parents #children #home #school #education
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It is striking that homeschooling is preferred to educate children
instead
 of going to
school
.
While
this
 trend has some benefits as saving time to reach the destination, the writer of
this
 essay supports the view that there is more interaction between learners and teachers when going to
school
.
Firstly
, learners focus on their lectures if they communicate directly with their teachers.
Although
this
 makes them
pay
Verb problem
spend
show examples
 more time and money on educational facilities at
school
, they cannot play games when they are at home.
Moreover
, schools help
student
Add an article
the student
a student
show examples
 improve their relation relationship with their friends and develop some skills. Moving onto the highlight of homeschooling, it outweighs the drawbacks and benefits of direct
school
,
This
 kind of education can follow the situation of learners.
Additionally
, homeschooling helps teachers divide classes into suitable grades and times
instead
 of handling too much difficulty for students.
To sum up
,
while
 homeschooling has positive aspects
such
 as flexibility in the time of study, I believe that its drawbacks outweigh the benefits.
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introduction
Provide a clearer introduction to the topic by directly addressing the prompt (i.e., discussing both advantages and disadvantages of homeschooling and clearly stating whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages).
balance
Ensure your argument is balanced by discussing both sides of the issue thoroughly before reaching a conclusion. This will strengthen your task response.
examples
Use examples to support your points more effectively. Specific examples can make your arguments more convincing and improve the score for task achievement.
coherence
Work on the coherence of your essay by improving the transitions between paragraphs. Smooth transitions will help your argument flow more naturally.
consistency
Avoid contradictory statements to ensure your position is consistent throughout the essay. Consistency in your argument will enhance your score for task achievement.
grammar and accuracy
Check your essay for grammatical mistakes and inaccuracies. Although small errors won't drastically affect your score, consistent accuracy can help achieve a higher band score.
topic relevance
You effectively addressed the topic and provided relevant discussions on both the benefits and drawbacks of homeschooling.
conclusion clarity
Your conclusion summarizes your viewpoint clearly, which is good for the coherence of your essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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