Popular events like the World Cup and other international sporting occasions are essential in easing international tensions and releasing patriotic emotions in a safe way . What extend do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

It is argued that worldwide events and international sports competitions,
such
as
Euroleague
Correct article usage
the Euroleague
show examples
and Diamond Olympic Games, have an important role in lessening tensions between
countries
and providing a safe environment to uncover nationalistic spirits.
This
essay totally agrees
that
Change preposition
with that
show examples
statement. I believe that international
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
occasions calm negative feelings down by engaging people with different
cultures
and reducing the drawbacks of nationalism. The first reason why popular sports events help to decrease harmful tensions is that they bring audiences up from different
cultures
.
This
kind of competition are great place to socialize, to help people to show their differentness to visitors from numerous
countries
, and of course to learn new beauties of the world’s cultural diversity. These interactions
strenghten
Correct your spelling
strengthen
world peace by engaging with different
kindsw
Correct your spelling
kinds
of
cultures
.
For example
, it was seen that
World
Correct article usage
the World
show examples
Cup after WW2 made a good impact on relaxing political tensions between Allies and Axis
countries
. International sports organizations always have
high
Add an article
a high
show examples
degree of competition and visitors usually support
their
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the
show examples
countries
that they are from because of their patriotic feelings. They unearth nationalistic souls by shouting for their
countries
rather than fighting with rivals.
Therefore
, they throw their nationalistic energies in a peaceful and enjoyable way. To give an example, the quarter-final match between Bulgaria and Romania basketball teams in Euroleague 2012 was the beginning of good relationships after political conflicts in the Balkans. In conclusion, because of getting countless
cultures
from different parts of the world together and diminishing the negative sides of nationalism, popular events and international sporting occasions are indispensable.
Submitted by smd1212 on

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Task Achievement
Thoroughly develop your main points with detailed examples and explanations to strengthen your argument.
Coherence & Cohesion
While your essay has a strong structure, consider varying your sentence structure and connectors for smoother transitions between ideas.
Task Achievement
Revisit your argument to ensure a balanced discussion, especially if you're strongly agreeing or disagreeing. Consider mentioning counterarguments briefly.
Coherence & Cohesion
Your essay effectively introduces and concludes the topic, clearly stating your position.
Task Achievement
You have used relevant examples to support your main points, such as the impact of the World Cup and the Euroleague basketball match.
Coherence & Cohesion
The topic sentences for paragraphs clearly signal the main idea, aiding the reader's understanding.

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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