Virtual reality be used as a tool for therapeutic interventions and mental health treatments. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#reality #tool #interventions #health #treatments

The advanced development and innovations of

technology

has

Change the verb form

have

show examples

brought a significant transformation to medical

treatment

modalities notably for

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

virtual

reality

as a

media

Replace the word

medium

show examples

for therapeutic interventions and mental health procedures. I agree with

this

viewpoint for the following reasons. The major reason for my agreement is that the visual impulses generated by digital

gadget

Fix the agreement mistake

gadgets

show examples

enhances

Change the verb form

enhance

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

brain function more easily than other psychological therapies.

For example

, virtual

reality

stimulates the chemicals inside the human nervous system called Neuro-transmitters and makes significant prognosis in the patient without consuming any medications.

Moreover

, the scope of customized patient care is more feasible in

this

therapy

compare

Wrong verb form

compared

show examples

to other typical audio-visual psychotherapies. To exemplify that,

therapist

Add an article

a therapist

the therapist

show examples

can choose numerous virtual

reality

video scenaries

that

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

actually suits for the patient like

visit to

Wrong verb form

visiting

show examples

some tourist places or destinations that the client actually

wish

Correct subject-verb agreement

wishes

show examples

vist

Correct your spelling

visit

in person. Another point to consider

that

Add a missing verb

is that

show examples

, developing powerful

technology

such

as virtual

reality

has transformed the provision of mental healthcare

that

Correct word choice

so that

show examples

individuals can access therapeutic services from their smartphones at any time.

For instance

, patients do not need to make appointments if their intense anxiety and

while

getting triggers

againt

Correct your spelling

against

again

extremely

perilious

Correct your spelling

perilous

post traumatic

Add a hyphen

post-traumatic

show examples

stress episodes.

In addition

, Virtual

reality

treatment

is less expensive

by compare

Change preposition

compared

show examples

to personal psychiatric consultations. By

this

patients can save money and time by

excepmting

Correct your spelling

excepting

exempting

unnecessary health care appointments. In conclusion,

Although

human connections help assist in mental healthcare, it seems to me that applying sophisticated

technology

to medical

treatment

is more applicable

due to

flexibility. I am still convinced that using a newly developed

technology

in medical

treatment

gives more convenience and health benefits to individuals.

Submitted by dixonpeter24 on Wed May 08 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Grammar

To improve clarity and effectiveness, focus on refining your grammatical structures and ensuring variety in your sentence constructions.

Spelling and Typing Errors

Make sure to proofread your essay to catch any typographical or spelling errors, enhancing the professionalism of your submission.

Precision of Language

Work on the precision of language, especially in technical terms, to ensure accuracy and clarity in your argumentation.

Structure

You effectively structure your essay with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which enhances its overall coherence.

Use of Examples

You provide relevant examples to support your main points, enhancing the persuasiveness of your arguments.

Task Response

Your essay demonstrates a strong agreement with the topic, and you present clear and comprehensive reasons to support your viewpoint.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

275 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

immersive environments
anxiety
PTSD (Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder)
phobia
exposure therapy
controlled setting
desensitization
social anxiety
stress reduction
real-time monitoring
therapeutic interventions
mental health treatments
digital divide
accessibility
cost-effectiveness
innovative solutions
face-to-face interactions
traditional therapeutic settings
gradual confrontation
calming environments

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5.5
band
It is suggested that primary children should learn how to grow vegetables and keep animals. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?
It's argued that children in primary schools should be taught to plant vegetables and take care of animals. This essay will argue that despite the fact that this often create more stress for students, the positives can far more outweigh the negatives for it can support a well-rounded education and contribute to student's well-being.
5
band
It is commonly believed that nowadays main factors that affect a child’s development are media, pop culture and friends. A different point of view is that family plays a significant role. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
The development of a child is a long term progress and affected by many factors coming from both inside and outside of them. There are cases where children are grown up with bad behaviours due to the influence of media, pop cultures and friends. Beside that, there are also children whose parents cause bad affects on their development. So what is the most important factors that affect a child's development?
8
band
Your workplace does not have a car park, causing some problems. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter •describe the problems; •explain what benefits a car park would bring to the company; •suggest a solution for the car park problem.
I am writing this letter to share about the problems and the causes of car parking.
5
band
TASK 2: WHEN ASKED TO CHOOSE BETWEEN A LIFE WITHOUT WORK AND WORKING MOST OF THE TIME, PEOPLE WOULD ALWAYS CHOOSE NOT TO WORK. DO YOU AGREE OR DISAGREE WITH THIS STATEMENT?
To choose between a life that people do not have to work and a life demand everyone to work most of the time, there is a majority of people who want to live a life with no work. However, this writer believe that human need to be hard-working everyday due to its benefit in financial enhancement and work promotion.
7
band
In many parts of the world people do research in family history. Some people believe that research on the previous generation to be useful while others say that it is better to focus on the present and future generation. Discuss and opinion.
It is true that family background always plays a crucial role in one's behaviour. Nowadays, seeking a family background seems to be an intellectual conflict in certain parts of the globe. While defenders argue that there are a number of beneficial outcomes in this notion, opponents express that it is futile. In my point of view, both ideologies are worth supporting. This essay delves into these statements and expresses my outlook before drawing a reasonable conclusion.

Virtual reality be used as a tool for therapeutic interventions and mental health treatments. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

It is suggested that primary children should learn how to grow vegetables and keep animals. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

It is commonly believed that nowadays main factors that affect a child’s development are media, pop culture and friends. A different point of view is that family plays a significant role. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Your workplace does not have a car park, causing some problems. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter •describe the problems; •explain what benefits a car park would bring to the company; •suggest a solution for the car park problem.

TASK 2: WHEN ASKED TO CHOOSE BETWEEN A LIFE WITHOUT WORK AND WORKING MOST OF THE TIME, PEOPLE WOULD ALWAYS CHOOSE NOT TO WORK. DO YOU AGREE OR DISAGREE WITH THIS STATEMENT?

In many parts of the world people do research in family history. Some people believe that research on the previous generation to be useful while others say that it is better to focus on the present and future generation. Discuss and opinion.