More and more people use private motorbikes or cars instead of taking public transport. What are the reasons for this trend? How can the government encourage people to take public transport? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

With a startling pace of worldwide technology and
economy
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economic
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deveoplment
Correct your spelling
development
in recent decades, private automobiles find
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
way to almost every family.
This
prevalent trend
are
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is
show examples
causing problems
such
as overcrowded traffic, vast pollution and
high
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a high
show examples
rate of road accidents. In
this
essay, I will talk about the reasons
of
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for
show examples
this
trend and the solutions to tackle the issues. First of all, preference in using own
vechiles
Correct your spelling
vehicles
to travel is simply resulting from the convenience. A private car allows the commuters to start the
engin
Correct your spelling
engine
anytime without waiting in a queue for a fixed schedule or any stops on their way. With the smart functions on the
vechiles
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vehicles
, the driver can listen to the radio, enjoy
the
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apply
show examples
music,
head
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and head
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to any
destinations
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destination
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by
navigation
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navigating
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on a digital map.
In addition
,
due to
the affordable price of nowadays cars and motorbikes, they become a common household
transportation
. Three decades ago, a sedan
is
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
not a usual commodity to an average family.
However
, in the current era, the living standard is growing fast
while
the price of cars is declining
owning
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owing
show examples
to the competition of the market. Eventually, owning a family car is an inevitable trend, the negative effects can not be ignored. It is imperative for the government to get out
out
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apply
show examples
of
this
dilemma by
encourageing
Correct your spelling
encouraging
people to take public
transportation
.
To begin
with, citizens should be educated about their
resoponsiblities
Correct your spelling
responsibilities
of
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for
show examples
protecting the environment. As one bus or subway can carry 10 times or 20 times more people than a car, each
individule
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individual
can minimize the carbon dioxide created on the way. Meanwhile, ticket
fare
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fares
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for public
transportation
should be reduced and free public
transportation
should be provided to special groups of people,
such
as the
stduents
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students
,
senior
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seniors
show examples
and the disabled.
Last
but not least, the
govenment
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government
should allocate the budget
into
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to
show examples
the road
constructions
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construction
show examples
so that more bus routes and subway lines can be put into use. If everyone
make
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makes
show examples
their effort and hand in hand with the government, a safer, cleaner, less crowded
tranffic
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transport
system will be under our feet.
Submitted by carriexue23 on

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task achievement
Try to provide more specific examples from your own experience or observations to support your arguments. While your essay touches on general reasons and solutions, including more detailed examples could strengthen your argument and task achievement score.
coherence cohesion
Work on varying your sentence structure and utilizing linking words more effectively to improve the flow of your essay. This can enhance the coherence and cohesion of your writing.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea, and use clear topic sentences to introduce these. This will help in making your essay more logically organized and easier to follow.
general
Review and correct minor inaccuracies in spelling, grammar, and punctuation to polish your writing. Although these small errors do not significantly impact your score, refining them can contribute to a more professional and coherent essay.
introduction conclusion present
You provided a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing your essay.
complete response
The essay addresses the reasons for the trend of using private vehicles and suggests some solutions, showing a good understanding of the task.
logical structure
You successfully utilized paragraphs to separate different ideas, which aids in the logical structure of your essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • public transport, private vehicles, convenience, reliability, status symbol, infrastructure, financial incentives, environmental regulations, societal benefits, awareness campaigns, user-friendly
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