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Band 4.5

Some claim that studying abroad has great benefits for a student’s home country. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#student’s #home #country
Nowadays, education is really important for children. Some people think that studying foreign has more and more beneficial choices for a student’s
home
country
. I think, both studying abroad and
home
Correct pronoun usage
my home
show examples
country
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
have some good experiments for everyone. In my opinion, I disagree with the above statement because I strongly trust in the students, which are
hard working
Add a hyphen
hard-working
show examples
, the boys and the girls will find
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 way to prove their
skill
Fix the agreement mistake
skills
show examples
 no matter what they have faced.They can pass it with their mindset. First of all, studying in another
country
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 many good
experiments
Correct your spelling
experiences
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,
besides
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the environment
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 changed from a dairy routine that will
made
Change the verb form
make
be made
show examples
 the children
growing
Wrong verb form
grow
show examples
 up in different ways, they will find new friends from learning their culture or they will find
new
Add an article
a new
show examples
 food that they have not ever
test
Verb problem
tasted
show examples
.
Secondly
, The learners who are
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
 student’s
home
country
 do not have any weak points ,since they have graduated. They do not have to
compared
Add a missing verb
be compared
show examples
 with others. For
instane
Correct your spelling
instance
, the
one
Correct pronoun usage
ones
show examples
 that
growth
Replace the word
grow
show examples
this
 way can create their own ways to make them very happy in their life.To make easier ways to explain that some of them might love to plant a tree
,
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apply
show examples
if they have
move
Change the verb form
moved
show examples
 to
another places
Replace the adjective
another place
other places
show examples
. They not only have to find the solutions to plant there but
also
 the main factor is different
environment
Fix the agreement mistake
environments
show examples
 and different seeds
it does
Wrong verb form
do
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 not
did
Change the verb form
do
show examples
 the same. In conclusion, I disagree that studying in different
countrys
Correct your spelling
countries
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 big
beneficials
Correct your spelling
beneficial
 things for a student’s
home
country
. Because learning is not
control
Wrong verb form
controlled
show examples
 by places.
Every one
Replace the word
Everyone
show examples
 can
approach
Verb problem
access
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 all of
information
Add an article
the information
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 from
Add an article
the internet
show examples
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
. You can
searching
Change the verb form
search
be searching
show examples
 for anything you want
Submitted by kanchanakularathna1991 on

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task achievement
Consider presenting a clearer thesis statement in your introduction that directly answers the prompt. This will set a solid foundation for your argument.
task achievement
Use specific examples to support your points. This strengthens your argument and makes your essay more persuasive.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and that all sentences within the paragraph support that idea.
coherence cohesion
Work on smoother transitions between sentences and paragraphs to guide the reader through your argument more effectively.
coherence cohesion
Pay attention to sentence structure and variety to improve readability and coherence.
task achievement
You took a clear stance on the topic, which is good for task achievement.
task achievement
You explored both sides of the argument, which adds depth to your essay.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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