Students should pay full cost for their own study, because university education benefits individuals rather than society. To what extend do you agree or disagree?
Nowadays, some people think that
students
should pay full
cost Correct article usage
the full
their
own Change preposition
of their
study
Fix the agreement mistake
studies
,
because Remove the comma
apply
university
Correct article usage
a university
education
benefits society
, but in my view, study
Wrong verb form
studying
for
Change preposition
on
own
or Correct pronoun usage
their own
study
Wrong verb form
studying
for benefits
Change preposition
to benefit
society
also
have
advantages and disadvantages. The author of Correct subject-verb agreement
has
this
essay disagree
with Change the verb form
disagrees
this
statement.
On the one hand, university
Correct article usage
a university
education
will teach you knowledge specialize
in Fix the infinitive
to specialize
career
that you choose after Correct article usage
the career
graduate
. Replace the word
graduation
Study
at Wrong verb form
Studying
university
don’t
be stressed like Correct subject-verb agreement
doesn’t
society
education
, you are taken care of by parents, school
. Correct word choice
and school
Besides
to
that, Change preposition
apply
study
at Wrong verb form
studying
university
also
has
more time for Verb problem
gives you
study
Wrong verb form
studying
your
Change preposition
for your
skill
job in the future. Fix the agreement mistake
skills
However
, university
Correct article usage
a university
education
not
similar to high school, which Add a missing verb
is not
are
comfortable, Correct subject-verb agreement
is
Correct word choice
and relax
relax
, but if you Wrong verb form
relaxing
don’t
aware of studying, you will fail Verb problem
aren’t
in
many exams in the future and the fact that you will pay a lot of money to Change preposition
apply
study
again.
When it comes to pay
for Change the verb form
paying
society
, the earlier improving social skills, the better not be confused after graduate
. It seems as if Replace the word
graduation
students
are more enthusiastic about everything related to Math, Physics, logic
subjects. Correct word choice
and logic
Consequently
, most students
are
lack Unnecessary verb
apply
of
confidence Change preposition
apply
on
Change preposition
in
society
, specially
the boys. Replace the word
especially
This
demonstrates that knowledgeable
Correct article usage
a knowledgeable
society
is significant for each students
, Change to a singular noun
student
therefore
, students
should spend money on society
similar to cost
Correct article usage
the cost
for
their own Change preposition
of
study
.
All things considered, the author totally Fix the agreement mistake
studies
disagree
with the view Correct subject-verb agreement
disagrees
of
Change preposition
that
students
should pay full
cost Correct article usage
the full
their
own Change preposition
of their
study
, because Fix the agreement mistake
studies
university
Correct article usage
a university
education
benefits individuals rather than society
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Introduction clarity
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Argument support
Work on developing clear and more compelling main points supported by specific examples or explanations. This will help strengthen your arguments.
Paragraph structure
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Task completion
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Balanced discussion
You've made an attempt to discuss both sides of the argument, which is good for providing a balanced view.
Essay structure
Your essay structure includes an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which is a good practice.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example
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