Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
In
this
current world, some people believe that sharing much information
about academic things, business, and science was
a good thing to do, Wrong verb form
is
while
others think otherwise
. From my perspective, there are truths for both of the views. The following paragraphs will clarify my stance.
Firstly
, some individuals agree that sharing data on education, corporations, and research is a wise idea. This
open information
will lead to greater benefit
because the more people know, the more they gain knowledge. Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
For example
, there is an open-source website on the internet that allows society to learn multiple skills, like knitting, breeding, carving, and plumbing. By learning from this
source, people will be more skilled in everything mentioned before. These humans will benefit from that. Therefore
, sharing information
is a great thing.
Secondly
, however
, some information
was too valuable to be shared without any compensation, regarding how much money that
has been involved in collecting the data. Correct pronoun usage
apply
Furthermore
, this
activity has also
demanded much effort from the actors. For instance
, when Covid-19 viruses spread all over the world, some laboratories conducted various experiments to solve these problems. These researches
spent a huge amount of funding and a lot of hard Correct your spelling
researchers
works
. When the result came out in Fix the agreement mistake
work
a
form of Correct article usage
the
vaccine
, it was sold Add an article
the vaccine
a vaccine
on
an expensive price. It was fair enough to pay back those involved in the experiments. Change preposition
at
Thus
, it was understandable that some data could not be shared freely.
In
balance, since sharing Change preposition
On
the
free Correct article usage
apply
information
is a good thing to do and paying for the information
is also
fair enough, it is hard for me to draw a conclusion, whether
I support the idea or not.Change preposition
about whether
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task achievement
Try to explicitly state your own opinion in the conclusion, making it clear where you stand on the issue.
coherence cohesion
Enhance the clarity of your essay by using varied linking words and clear topic sentences for each paragraph.
language
Incorporate a wider range of vocabulary to convey your points more forcefully and to avoid repetition.
task achievement
You have effectively discussed both views on the topic, providing a balanced analysis.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of your essay allows for easy following, aiding reader comprehension.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction sets up the essay topic and structure well, preparing the reader for what follows.
task achievement
Including specific examples, like the reference to open-source websites and COVID-19 vaccines, strengthens your arguments and provides clear support for your points.
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