thw graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040.

thw graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The line graph illustrates data about the number of people living in 4 Asian countries over
51-year
Add an article
a 51-year
the 51-year
show examples
period from 1970 to 2020, with assumptions by 2040. The unit of measurement is percentage.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is apparently seen that the population saw a
rose
Replace the word
rise
show examples
in all countries, namely
Philippines
Correct article usage
the Philippines
show examples
, Malaysia, Thailand and Indonesia. It is crystal clear that the number of people increased sharply from 1990 in Malaysia (from 45%)
while
Linking Words
it
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
was
Verb problem
apply
show examples
decreased
Change preposition
in
show examples
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
Philippines
Correct article usage
the Philippines
show examples
.
However
Linking Words
, there was a rise in 2010 and predicted that would be kept by 2040. Meanwhile, the figures
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
Thailand and Indonesia had a steady
rose
Replace the word
rise
show examples
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
and
assumed
Add a missing verb
are assumed
show examples
to be at 45% and 60%
accordingly
Linking Words
.
Submitted by dussip.rustem on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: