IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Governments should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#governments #money #railways #roads
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Roads
Use synonyms
 and
railways
Use synonyms
 both are
the
Correct article usage
apply
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crucial
part
Fix the agreement mistake
parts
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 of
communication
Add an article
the communication
a communication
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 system. It is believed that authorities must spend
money
Use synonyms
 on
railways
Use synonyms
instead
Linking Words
 of other
roads
Use synonyms
. I completely disagree with
this
Linking Words
 viewpoint because it may put
strain
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a strain
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 on
economy
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the economy
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as well as
Linking Words
 create challenges for
people
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. On the one hand, spending
money
Use synonyms
 only on
railways
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 may put pressure on economic growth.
That is
Linking Words
 to say that both tracks are essential for the development of a nation, if
authority
Fix the agreement mistake
authorities
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 solely focus on
railways
Use synonyms
then
Linking Words
other transportation system
Change the wording
another transportation system
other transportation systems
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 will be negligible as the
roads
Use synonyms
 might not be in good condition.
Consequently
Linking Words
, it will be difficult to earn
money
Use synonyms
 and support the economy.
For example
Linking Words
, in countries, like Bangladesh,
government
Correct article usage
the government
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 allocate substantial
amount
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amounts
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 of
money
Use synonyms
both
Change preposition
for both
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railways
Use synonyms
 and other
roads
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 as
such
Linking Words
 they can use every transport and generate
money
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 as much as possible,
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
railways
Use synonyms
 cannot be helpful for the
people
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 who live in cities
due to
Linking Words
 limited transport
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
city
Add an article
the city
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center
Change the spelling
centre
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.
In other words
Linking Words
, if
government
Correct article usage
the government
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 invest more
money
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on
Change preposition
in
show examples
railways
Use synonyms
 rather than
roads
Use synonyms
 and highways
then
Linking Words
 it might create
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
 for
people
Use synonyms
 at the time when they commute as
roads
Use synonyms
 are not available or remain underdevelopment.
For instance
Linking Words
, in India, invest
money
Use synonyms
 not only
Use synonyms
railways
Change preposition
in railways
show examples
 but
also
Linking Words
 in other
roads
Use synonyms
 as they try to mitigate the problems faced by
people
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, I strongly disagree with the notion that
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 should
spent
Change the verb form
spend
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money
Use synonyms
 only
railways
Use synonyms
 because it might put pressure on the
economical
Replace the word
economic
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 growth of a country and there is a chance to create issues for citizens.
Submitted by mohammad39 on

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task achievement
To improve, try to expand your ideas with more detailed examples directly from your own experience or general knowledge that precisely support your argument.
coherence & cohesion
Organize your paragraphs more clearly. Each paragraph should start with a clear topic sentence that indicates what will be discussed.
coherence & cohesion
Use a wider range of linking words to create smoother transitions between sentences and paragraphs. This will enhance the readability of your essay.
task achievement
Address a broader range of perspectives to fully engage with the essay question. Considering both sides, even if you choose to argue against one, can enrich your discussion.
task achievement
You have a clear stance and conclusion, consistently maintaining your position throughout the essay.
coherence & cohesion
Your essay is structured with an introduction, main bodies, and a conclusion, which aids in overall coherence.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Carbon emissions
  • Mass transportation
  • Traffic congestion
  • Economic growth
  • Regional development
  • Initial investment
  • Feasibility
  • Flexibility
  • Rural areas
  • Integration
  • Sustainable
  • Efficiency
  • Infrastructure
  • Commuters
  • Public expenditure
  • Autonomous vehicles
  • Long-term investment
  • Accessibility
  • Connectivity
  • Modal shift
What to do next:
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