IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

thw graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040.

thw graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040.
#thw #information #percentage #population #four #asian #countries #cities #predictions
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The given bar chart illustrates the ratio of people staying in Asian-related areas in urban areas from the past to the future between 19470 and 2040. The general overview here is that, over time, there was a significant increase in the country group of Malaysia at 81 per
cent
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 in the percentages of Thailand, there was the lowest in the country group at 45 per
cent
Use synonyms
.
According to
Linking Words
 the data, in 1970, in the country group of Malaysia and Indonesia, there were essential to the first note that, the proportion of began at 30 and 12 per
cent
Use synonyms
,
However
Linking Words
, Between 1980 and 2040, The ratio of Malaysia and Indonesia increased dramatically, from 40 to 80 per
cent
Use synonyms
 and between 13 and 60 per
cent
Use synonyms
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, The percentage of the Philippines and Thailand, there were starting at 30 and 19 per
cent
Use synonyms
,
In addition
Linking Words
, In 1980 and 2010, there was a considerable fluctuation between 40 and 42 and from 22 to 30 per
cent
Use synonyms
,
In contrast
Linking Words
, In 2020 and 2040, The percentages of Philippines and Thailand, increased significantly from 41 to 50 and Between 30 and 45 per
cent
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by chalermchartbsc on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words cent with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "ratio" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "significant" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: