Many parents encourage young people to leave home when they become older, while others think that should stay at home with the family. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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In contemporary

Change preposition

Contemporary

show examples

humans are becoming times which new helpfulness technology

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

own. In the family,

parents

Use synonyms

when older want more help from

children

Use synonyms

for their health, communication and lifefulness.

therefore

Linking Words

parents

Use synonyms

want to know

this

Linking Words

situation

children

Use synonyms

must stay on their own or not.

Although

Linking Words

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

Verb problem

apply

show examples

respectful traditions, youth can lead their own lives without their

parents

Use synonyms

. Every person must be free in adulty times,

cause

Correct word choice

because

show examples

this

Linking Words

is most important for the future, personal face in society and own new family. But after some periods will be extended family and reunion relatives.

For example

Linking Words

, every young family want to learn to own

children

Use synonyms

the hold conversations through relatives' affection. In that time getting

together with

Linking Words

loved ones

motivate

Wrong verb form

motivated

show examples

and

belief

Replace the word

believed

show examples

for

Change preposition

show examples

the future of

children

Use synonyms

. On the other side

parents

Use synonyms

, even if they are older times do not want to be

together with

Linking Words

their own

children

Use synonyms

instead

Linking Words

of they want a different situation with their own

life

Use synonyms

mate.

For instance

Linking Words

, older

life

Use synonyms

for

parents

Use synonyms

may be the trips, creation of new places or finding own new lifemates friends.

And in

Correct word choice

show examples

that position

learn

Wrong verb form

learned

show examples

more skills and maybe come more amazing ideas for older. In conclusion, I think every person has a right to choose for older

life

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

period may be loved ones or new strangers with hold conversations,

Linking Words

furthermore

Add a comma

furthermore,

show examples

life

Use synonyms

is continuing

Change preposition

show examples

the bright side own line. And

this

Linking Words

position will show different challenges to

children

Use synonyms

, adults and every youth in

life

Use synonyms

. Staying with relatives or strangers in older

life

Use synonyms

is not incorrect for humans.

makemoneyizzy16Sat May 11 2024

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Structure

Your essay provides an interesting perspective on the topic, suggesting a considerable understanding of the prompt. However, it's important to structure your arguments more clearly to effectively guide the reader through your points. Consider using clear introductory sentences for paragraphs and transitions to connect ideas.

Task Response

You've touched upon relevant ideas about the autonomy of youth and parental preferences in adulthood. To enhance task achievement, focus on directly addressing both views presented in the prompt and providing more specific examples to support your arguments.

Coherence & Cohesion

For coherence and cohesion, try to maintain a clear thread of discussion throughout your essay. This can be improved by planning your essay to ensure that each paragraph logically flows from one to the next, and by using cohesive devices effectively.

Language

Pay attention to grammar and vocabulary. Using a wider range of vocabulary and grammatical structures can improve the clarity and sophistication of your argument. Additionally, revising for grammatical accuracy can further enhance your essay's readability.

Engagement

You engage with the prompt, offering a thoughtful personal opinion on the issue at hand.

Organization

There is a noticeable attempt to organize ideas into paragraphs, which is a good practice for structuring essays.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

258 words

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Many parents encourage young people to leave home when they become older, while others think that should stay at home with the family. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Your opinion

Nowadays, more and more people decide to have children later in their life. What are the reasons? What solutions do you suggest for this problem? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some people say that the only reason for learning a foreign language is in order to travel to or work in a foreign country. Others say that these are not the only reasons why someone should learn a foreign language. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people say that students who achieve the highest scores in their exams should be rewarded. Others say that those who show progress should be rewarded instead. Discuss both views and give your opinion.