It is importance for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? What sort of punishment should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behaviour to children?

#importance #children #difference #right #age #punishment #distinction #sort #parents #teachers #behaviour

Nowadays,

children

are exposed

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show examples

a diversified environment where massive information is accessible. It is vital for schools and parents to teach them

distinguish

Fix the infinitive

to distinguish

show examples

right from wrong as early as possible. I

also

believe

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that

show examples

using appropriate

punishment

when necessary would benefit forming good values at an early age. It is unfortunate that in the midst of vast progress in every field of

life

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life,

show examples

there is

also

a growth of issues among the young generation,

such

as campus violence, early anti-social behaviour and juvenile

deliquency

Correct your spelling

delinquency

. These issues are

due to

youngest's

Correct article usage

the youngest's

show examples

immaturity.

For example

children

are easily influenced by violent scenes on TV because they are unable to realize whether it is right or wrong, even worse, they may imitate the violence because they think it is "cool" and "fun".

Therefore

, it is imperative to educate

children

and form their correct

value

Fix the agreement mistake

values

show examples

. Under some circumstances,

punishment

should be brought out to help

youngest

Correct article usage

the youngest

show examples

understand the severe consequences if they fail to learn the distinction. Some people argue that

punishment

may cause detrimental effects on young

children

phsychologically

Correct your spelling

psychologically

Therefore

adequet

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adequate

and appropriate measures should be taken at

right

Add an article

the right

show examples

moment.

For instance

, if violent

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

show examples

learnt from TV happens on campus, parents should limit the hours or "ban the happy hours" of their kids for a few days. To cite another example, if a student makes

joke

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a joke

show examples

about his or her classmate, he or she can be punished

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show examples

cleaning the classroom

thus

educating him or her school is a place to learn to be friendly, kind,

cooperating

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cooperative

show examples

and

dedicating

Wrong verb form

dedicated

show examples

. In

conlusion

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conclusion

, teaching

children

good judgement is crucial,

thought

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though

show examples

punishment

is not without negative effects, I do think it is positive if schools and parents use it wisely.

Submitted by carriexue23 on Sun May 12 2024

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Coherence and Cohesion

Work on varying your sentence structures to provide a more dynamic and engaging tone.

Coherence and Cohesion

Ensure that you are using punctuation accurately to improve readability and clarity.

Task Achievement

Although you have provided examples, try to delve deeper into analyzing these examples to clearly link them back to your main argument.

Introduction

You have a clear thesis statement that sets the direction of your essay effectively.

Content

Good use of examples to support your points.

Task Achievement

You have successfully addressed all parts of the task with relevant examples and explanations.

Logical Structure

The essay is logically organized with clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

286 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Nowadays, more and more people from different places are spending more time away from their families.What are the possible reasons and the effects on the people themselves ?

In many countries people can go to a supermarket and buy products

In the past, people used to travel abroad to look many differences from their home country. Nowadays, the sceneries in places all over the world are more and more similar. What are the causes of the similarities? Do you think the advantages of this similarity outweigh the disadvantages?