Nowadays, more and more people decide to have children later in their life. What do you think are the reasons for this? Do advantages of this trend outweigh disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
With the fact that having kids can be a
life time
wish for so many people, there are more individuals leaning to the decision of not having children. I am going to bring reasons and Correct your spelling
lifetime
debating
on Replace the word
debate
pros
and cons of the possible outcome in the future.
On the one hand, young generations believe that dedicating their Correct article usage
the pros
life
to process personal growth weather
within themselves or choosing a career path as a priority would eventually cause a better outcome for their country Correct your spelling
whether
as well as
their own purpose in life
. Also
with the global awareness of mental health during the past decade, many believe that baring children while
having unsolved trauma can be counted as careless and violent Change preposition
to in
in
Correct your spelling
an
extend
, considering the fact that these errors in every parent or guardian can lead to Replace the word
extent
sever
problems a child will have to carry in Correct your spelling
severe
life
. With the governmental difficulties and the lack of financial recourses
the population has been facing recently, a study published Correct your spelling
resources
at
Emma magazine shows that more than 65 Change preposition
in
percent
of young families have trouble deciding whether Change the spelling
per cent
if
baring children will do any good for either themselves or Correct word choice
apply
the
humanity.
Correct article usage
apply
On the other hand
, even though any decline in the young population in every country can cause massive problems and undeniable outcomes in the future, causing countries to take actions that might end up more destructive under this
condition, families (Women in special
) cannot be forced to do the exact same as their ancestors advised them to do so, especially with all the mental and physical outcomes it can have on women.
Correct word choice
particular
To conclude
, being blessed by the miracle of creating an
another human being is an exciting matter. But Remove the article
apply
it is clear that
all the modern life
limits mentioned above can trigger families for
not Change preposition
to
choosing
Wrong verb form
choose
this
path at all.Submitted by TUTOO on
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task achievement
Your essay provides a thoughtful exploration of the topic, but could benefit from more explicit examples to support your points. Including specific studies, statistical data, or personal anecdotes can strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
While you've structured your essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, consider using clearer topic sentences and transition phrases to enhance the flow of ideas between paragraphs.
task achievement
To improve task achievement, ensure each paragraph clearly responds to the prompt. A more direct examination of the advantages and disadvantages, as asked in the question, would strengthen your response.
task achievement
You've done well in addressing both sides of the argument, considering various perspectives on why people may choose to have children later in life or not at all.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are effectively framed, providing a clear overview of the essay's topic and summarizing your main arguments concisely.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.