Every year several languages die out. Some people think that this is not important because life will be easier if there are fewer languages in the world. Is this a positive or negative development?

It is
undeniable
Correct article usage
an undeniable
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fact that there are so many
languages
are
Correct pronoun usage
that are
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about to disappear
due to
popularity
Correct article usage
the popularity
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of international
languages
.
Propenents
Correct your spelling
Proponents
are in the fever of
this
phenomenon.
However
, I have
partial
Add an article
a partial
show examples
view
with
Change preposition
of
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this
notion. I will explain the pros and cons in the upcoming paragraphs.
Firstly
,
To become
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Becoming
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bilingual or
knowledge
Add a missing verb
having knowledge
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about international
language
Fix the agreement mistake
languages
show examples
is very beneficial in
this
global era. Many of the international organisations deal with English or French which has higher native speakers in the world. So, if you know
to
Rephrase
how to
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speak English or French, you can easily get
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
job opportunities in multinational companies. To provide an example, there
is
Verb problem
apply
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a more the 2000000 native speakers in India who
speaks
Correct subject-verb agreement
speak
show examples
English and work at multinational companies in the world.
Secondly
, The knowledge of
domestic
Add an article
the domestic
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language
of a particular region where you want to travel or work,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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provides you
assist
Replace the word
assistance
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to
know
Wrong verb form
knowing
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more about their culture or
boast
Verb problem
boosts
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their
Correct pronoun usage
your
show examples
confidence to get familiar with the local people. It allows you to broaden your horizons,
explore
Correct word choice
and explore
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different cultures, places and their taste and traditions.
However
, Being bilingual is good but never forget our root
language
. To speak in our mother
language
is a feeling to get in touch with our history, parents our culture. If we feel
hesitate
Replace the word
hesitant
show examples
to talk in our own
language
, how can we teach our children and their grandchildren
.
Change the punctuation
?
show examples
Soon it will
become
Verb problem
apply
show examples
disappear from the world.
For instance
,
their
Replace the word
there
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is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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more than 26
languages
in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
India which
has
Verb problem
are
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completely distinct. To Recapitulate, knowledge of international
languages
provide
Correct subject-verb agreement
provides
show examples
you
opportunities
Change preposition
with opportunities
show examples
to get employment in multinational companies,
broaden
Correct word choice
and broaden
show examples
their
Correct pronoun usage
your
show examples
horizons. But, Giving
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
equal importance to the native
language
is very essential
otherwise
soon we will
lost
Change the verb form
lose
be lost
show examples
our history, culture and traditions.
Submitted by 1402randhawapreet on

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Coherence Cohesion
Use a wider range and accuracy of complex sentence structures to improve coherence and cohesion.
Coherence Cohesion
Incorporate a wider variety of linking words and phrases to smoothly guide the reader through your arguments, making your essay more cohesive.
Task Achievement
Clearly address the prompt by covering both sides of the argument adequately, making sure to provide a balanced discussion.
Task Achievement
Support your opinions with more specific examples and explanations to fully satisfy the task requirements and offer a comprehensive view on the topic.
Content
You presented a balanced view, discussing both benefits and downsides of fewer languages in the world, which shows a good understanding of the essay topic.
Structure
Your introduction and conclusion are present, providing a structure to your essay.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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