In many cities,CCTV camers are being used tn order to tacle crime. Is this a positive or negative development?

#cities #cctv #camers #tn #tacle #crime #development

In my opinion,

monitors

play a crucial role in today's world, both mitigating crime

events

and strengthening the well-being index for citizens across society. The emergence of

monitors

in today's life has brought positive changes.

Such

as Surveillance — enhancing criminal emergency

events

before they occur. It can significantly enhance community stability in terms of security and the well-being index of

people

, leading to the creation of more prosperous societies.

Monitors

are

also

installed in institutions

such

as police stations

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and

strikingly

Add a missing verb

are strikingly

show examples

helped by implementing

monitors

For instance

, if a criminal event happens in an isolated village, the police may not be able to travel immediately. But nowadays, policemen can rely on

monitors

to investigate it effectively.

Monitors

more through the principle of recording objectively,

monitors

have not only helped national power institutions investigate occurrences at specific times but have

also

been implemented in family scenes throughout the world.

For instance

monitors

have been helping elderly homes widely used in China's

aging

Change the spelling

ageing

show examples

population. Implementing

monitors

significantly helps

people

look for their parents and observe seniors'

healthy

Replace the word

health

show examples

conditions as well when they

far

Add a missing verb

are far

show examples

from home.

Furthermore

, as the variety of

monitors

increases

people

can choose a kind of monitor with alerts to notify them of any emerging

events

. All in all,

monitors

can be used not only in formal settings but

also

implemented in daily life. They enhance

people

's sense of well-being and prevent criminal

events

before they occur. By promoting harmony in society, they contribute to creating a better world.

Submitted by s_syedy on Mon May 13 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Structure and Grammar

Develop your paragraphs with more varied and complex sentence structures to enhance the clarity and impact of your arguments.

Content

Introduce more specific examples and data to support your claims, adding weight and credibility to your arguments.

Word Choice

Ensure that all instances of terminology (e.g., "monitors" instead of "CCTV cameras") are accurate and consistent throughout your essay to avoid confusion.

Coherence

You've done a great job creating a logical flow throughout the essay. Continue to connect ideas and paragraphs clearly to maintain reader engagement.

Task Response

You effectively addressed both the implementation and benefits of CCTV in combating crime and enhancing societal well-being.

Structure

The essay is generally well-organized, with a clear introduction and conclusion.

Content

You used relevant examples to support your arguments, demonstrating a good understanding of the topic.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

250 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
In some cities and towns all over the world, the high volume of traffic is a problem.What are the causes of this and wha actions can be taken to solve this problem?
The issue of traffic congestion is the most dominant problem all over the globe. Having this maximum number of jam problems causes air pollution, noise pollution and time consumption. There are various resolutions to control the effects of this rising issue. I will explain the causes and actions that should require prompt decisions and thus lead to a logical conclusion.
6
band
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
In recent times scientists have introduced a lot of new revolutionary technologies, which had a positive impact on people's lives. I agree with the given statement, that science should focus, on how to enhance an individual's daily life.
5
band
Today's society provides people with various ways to lose weight, such as special diets or exercise regimes. Many people believe though that poor food and today's lifestyle should be addressed first. What is your opinion? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.
In the contemporary modern world, people are more concern about their weight and part of the society believes that best method to lose weight as diet and exercise while others think lifestyle changes and changing in the type of food as the ways to do it. In my conviction, change in the lifestyle and the type of food should be the first thing to adress, in focus of the goal of loosing the weight.
5
band
In the future, nobody will buy printed newspapers or books because they will be able to read everything, they want online without paying. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Newspapers and books are losing their popularity now. There is a statement that some newspapers or books will not be used because people can read everything online without spending money. I personally disagree with this statement for strong reasons.
5
band
Fewer and fewer children are willing to look after their parents as they get older these days. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages.
In these days, due to hectic lifestyle children have no enough time to take care their ancestors which becomes a common issue among families only few of them are ready to look after their elders nowadays. I will explain my views on this topic in following paragraphs.

In many cities,CCTV camers are being used tn order to tacle crime. Is this a positive or negative development?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In some cities and towns all over the world, the high volume of traffic is a problem.What are the causes of this and wha actions can be taken to solve this problem?

In the future, nobody will buy printed newspapers or books because they will be able to read everything, they want online without paying. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Fewer and fewer children are willing to look after their parents as they get older these days. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages.