In many cities,CCTV camers are being used tn order to tacle crime. Is this a positive or negative development?

In my opinion,
monitors
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play a crucial role in today's world, both mitigating crime
events
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and strengthening the well-being index for citizens across society. The emergence of
monitors
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in today's life has brought positive changes.
Such
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as Surveillance — enhancing criminal emergency
events
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before they occur. It can significantly enhance community stability in terms of security and the well-being index of
people
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, leading to the creation of more prosperous societies.
Monitors
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are
also
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installed in institutions
such
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as police stations
,
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apply
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and
strikingly
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are strikingly
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helped by implementing
monitors
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.
For instance
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, if a criminal event happens in an isolated village, the police may not be able to travel immediately. But nowadays, policemen can rely on
monitors
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to investigate it effectively.
Monitors
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more through the principle of recording objectively,
monitors
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have not only helped national power institutions investigate occurrences at specific times but have
also
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been implemented in family scenes throughout the world.
For instance
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,
monitors
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have been helping elderly homes widely used in China's
aging
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ageing
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population. Implementing
monitors
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significantly helps
people
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look for their parents and observe seniors'
healthy
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health
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conditions as well when they
far
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are far
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from home.
Furthermore
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, as the variety of
monitors
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increases
people
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can choose a kind of monitor with alerts to notify them of any emerging
events
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. All in all,
monitors
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can be used not only in formal settings but
also
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implemented in daily life. They enhance
people
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's sense of well-being and prevent criminal
events
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before they occur. By promoting harmony in society, they contribute to creating a better world.

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Structure and Grammar
Develop your paragraphs with more varied and complex sentence structures to enhance the clarity and impact of your arguments.
Content
Introduce more specific examples and data to support your claims, adding weight and credibility to your arguments.
Word Choice
Ensure that all instances of terminology (e.g., "monitors" instead of "CCTV cameras") are accurate and consistent throughout your essay to avoid confusion.
Coherence
You've done a great job creating a logical flow throughout the essay. Continue to connect ideas and paragraphs clearly to maintain reader engagement.
Task Response
You effectively addressed both the implementation and benefits of CCTV in combating crime and enhancing societal well-being.
Structure
The essay is generally well-organized, with a clear introduction and conclusion.
Content
You used relevant examples to support your arguments, demonstrating a good understanding of the topic.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general
What to do next:
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